Why is it so hard to talk to an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend?

it’s hard to talk to an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend because you have a history and so many feelings attached to it. it’ll become easier to talk to them eventually but it’s going to be hard to talk to them for a while because you’re so used to talking to them and thinking of them as one of the most important people in your life and then suddenly they aren’t really in your life anymore but you still have all of those feelings but you’re not doing anything with them. when you break up, the feelings are still there but you keep them inside and, when you see an ex, they all come flooding back.

It has to do with emotions. Akwardness as I have experienced it so far has to do with emotions, or more precisely it has to do with yoursel feeling out of his comfort zone. Whether it is dealing with a stranger, being in a middle of a confrontation or meeting with your ex. People feel akward because they lack awareness of the situation or they get emotionally or better mentally blocked. They do not know how to respond to the situation at hand as they do not know what to expect or they do not have a specific outcome in mind. When you break up, you decide from that moment and on that you’lol exclude the other person from your life. Some people have the emotional capacity to handle a friends with benefits situation or just friends after a break up. Some other don’t.

It's not hard in general. I saw all possibilities, easy, hard, and all in between. Depends on multiple things, or forces. Memories, habits developed together, especially those negative ones. These get activated, and it's like both individuals see through glasses with thick colored glasses. Somehow, whenever you see a person from the past, it's like everything continues from where it was last time. Clearly generates confusion. Another thing is clearly the actual dissonance between the two. In the past, this dissonance was there, but individuals worked subconsciously to get over it, being together, forced to create harmony, for the relationship to continue. But after you get separated, no need for that work. And when you come back together, dissonance is very sharp and clear. As it always was, but now there is no active work to balance it. Then you have the current situations. He might be involved in another relationship, she might be involved in another relationship. Those partners are watchful :D The current relationships, are blocking. Then you have potentially repressed things, that were never said, and when you get together again, those things bubble up, and distort the contact, making it hard to happen. Plus other micro forces that i cannot recall now. But these are most important ones i see.

You feel all the emotions rushing back, especially if the relationship was toxic you feel bad because you settled for less. Well, most of the time, we can't help but keep thinking about the relationship that was before, and it's hard to accept the fact that it's over now. And also, feeling of guilt, when you feel you could have saved the relationship. Most times we still feel something for our ex and we are a little bit scared that he or she might not feel the same way anymore. You might as well feel as if you have failed your ex

Sometimes we believe we have moved in from a person and even when you have a new partner, there may not have been enough "closure" and there may still be answers you need to find out. Despite how things end between two people, there will always be unanswered questions or unresolved feelings and this may not always be because you are still in love with them, but simply because things ended. No matter what happened between you and an ex, nothing can change the fact you were apart of each others lives and nothing can change the memories you created together. So even when things have been left on good terms, it can be difficult to talk to an ex because they used to be apart of your life and now they aren't. It's only human to miss an emotion or to look back on memories and have feelings. It doesn't mean you still care for them, it just means those memories remind you of a time when things were different.

I think it's so hard to talk to an ex because you have to talk to them so differently. You have so many thoughts you're used to sharing and so many memories about the things you did; it's awkward to pretend none of it ever happened. Sometimes it's difficult for one of two reasons: either they broke up with you and you're unsure how to approach them again, or you broke up with them and you're not sure of how to address their hurt feelings. However, an attempt to reconnect is always great. Some exes turn out to be great friends.

Sometimes as time passes, we tend to romanticize or look upon our ex with rose coloured glasses (remembering the good times). Talking to them gives us nostalgia and transports us to the time we were together (back to our past self). Sometimes they've caused us significant pain, but we cannot forget them. Hatred, bitterness and anger aren't the opposite of love. Indifference is. We don't like to admit to ourselves that they're presence, online or in person, affect us still. Because, like it or not, a part of our heart left with them. Sometimes, we hate to admit to ourselves that we've struggled to get it back ever since.

There could be a list of reasons why talking to an ex can be so difficult. To name a few, it could be because there is unfinished business between the two people. Naturally, this can lead to a range of positive and negative emotions. Another reason could be because of the damaged that may have been caused through out the relationship. The possibility of one or both people have new partners, and that most of the time makes it incredibly difficult to be able to talk your ex. Additionally, the break up itself may have been really bad. These are just to name a few. Every relationship is different so ultimately the reasons why it is difficult to talk to an ex will change from one person to the next.

Ex-boyfriends / Ex-girlfriends can be difficult to talk to because you once had an intimate and close connection with them and now you don't. The loss of that connection puts you and your ex in a different, uncharted territory. You don't know what your new connection will be like, or what communication with your ex with no connection between the two of you will be like if the two of you are unable to reconnect in a way that isn't romantic, sexual, etc. Entering into a social situation without any knowledge of what's likely to transpire can be scary. We can't prepare ourselves for what we can't predict, so entering into a conversation with an ex with no clue what the tone of the discussion will be like can cause anxiety. How can you know how warm & friendly or cold & uncaring you should be? And, most importantly, how can find ways of protecting your broken or newly-mended heart when you have no idea how a person will react to you? You can't. You're entering into a situation in which you're necessarily vulnerable. Being vulnerable with someone is difficult for a lot of people, and being vulnerable with someone you have a rocky past with is ever harder.

After breakup your mind clearly accept the fact that you both can't be together for lifetime but your heart still beats for them. You still get butterfly whenever you hear from them. It's really hard to forget about someone after remembering and talking to them daily. So I think it's all because your mind wants to forget that person but talking to them daily won't let it happen so it's hard to talk to an ex bf or ex gf. So it's better to stop talking to them otherwise you will end up hurting yourself. Try to move on and be happy.