Why do I keep going back to my toxic relationship?

The first and most important issue that toxic relationship induce after it "goes off" is the emotional space". It used to fill some space inside you, it could be filling it with pain, sad events, quarrells, drama, or even some sort of attention. So we need to plan for filling the gaps before we decide to leave. You prepare where to go, but you do n't prepare the substitute for your daily life activities that you used to during the toxic relationship. That means you need to insert more interesting and useful activities and people in your life while stepping out of the toxic area. Go back to old hobbies you used to enjoy, or adopt new pet, or reconnect with friends and family members, or start learning new skill, or just go discovering the country side and be open to new friends, and do not forget to keep a sharp eye on the red flags because victims of toxic relationships have greater possiblities to fall in love with a toxic person than the rest of us. I know the experience you went through made you stronger, so I am sure with taking care of these points you will regain your self confidence and your future. Wish you all the happiness from the bottom of my heart.

You might find yourself returning to a toxic relationship because of how close you once were with that person. Maybe you feel like they are a constant in your life and are very familiar, even though they have a negative impact on your mental health and life in general. You may also feel nervous and apprehensive about starting your life without them in it because they may have provided you with a sense of security. The world outside of that relationship can be frightening as it is full of uncertainties and unspoken rules and you don't have the toxic person to turn to when you feel anxious about it. Finally, the 'love' that the toxic person may have given you may reflect the same 'love' you received from your parents as a child if you also had a toxic relationship with your family. This could manifest as arguing, controlling, lack of trust, or a tumultuous relationship.

I came out of 2 years long toxic relationship and I can relate to this personally. I was being cheated on, lied to, and gaslighted when I confronted him. In my case, this usually happened because I told myself that only he can provide the kind of love and vibe I was getting from him. I had severe attachment issues and for me, one person was always enough. I kept going back because I thought that I can't ever vibe with anyone like I did with him. Throughout those 2 years, he was very kind, supportive, and sometimes very emotional too but on the other, he was always lying, cheating, and not caring as well. I chose to ignore the NOT part and only see what he did to make me feel better even tho it was scarcely provided. But I learned that this relationship had given me so many insecurities. We go back because we think that this is the love we deserve.

There is actually many reasons as to why we fall back into toxicity. One reason might be that we subconsciously want the love we think we deserve. Another is hope. If we put our hope into the wrong things it can cause great damage. Some people hope that their partner could change. So, they stay or come back into the relationship hoping that it could be different this time, which it prob won't. People who tend to go back into a toxic relationship doesn't fully grasp or understand their self worth enough. If you've dealt with toxicity you wouldn't risk your mental health again and jump right at it. You would leave proudly knowing you saved a lot of time and stress when doing so.

In toxic relationships, there are usually periods of extreme highs, followed by period of extreme lows. In those extreme highs, you feel very connected to your partner and the euphoria can feel magical. These highs can get addictive, and can be the reason why you keep wanting to go back to that relationship, even though you know it's unhealthy. There can also be a trauma bond, and that's especially true in abusive relationships. The unhealthy patterns become the new normal, and that's where it gets dangerous: the people involved can't see how bad their situation has gotten until it's too late.

Often times we stick to one person because one aspect of them brings us so much joy. Even if they make it hard for us to live our life, that one quality they have is the one thing we severely lack. We constantly want to fill voids within US so we seek them out and do anything possible to obtain them. People try to become complete and as they fill holes they end up making more holes. As long as you are able to find a replacement for those issues then it will become much easier to leave.

You may keep going back because you want to feel something in your life. And you want to believe and think that there is love there. It is perfectly normal and although its not necessarily healthy, it is a pretty common thing to do. Running back to toxic relationships can be a pretty big thing. You also may be running back because you don't want that person to be with another and treat them "better" than they did you. and you only want that for yourself. You may think that they are the only person that can bring you happiness and joy. However there are plenty more fish in the sea. :)

Toxic relationships have a weird magnetism that's fueled by a few lies we are told and tell ourselves. The first is that nobody could ever love us like that person does; the second is that we could never find anybody else as "great" as this person. Sometimes there's one big factor that has such an allure for each person that it seems too hard to walk away, even though both people know it's really not that good of a relationship. So, what to do? Recognize you don't have to be with someone, especially this person, to have value. Be willing to take a step in the direction of healing and risk feeling lonely at times to find out what you can do outside this relationship. After a time you can really get clear enough to reflect on the relationship and see what you would want to avoid in the future.

There are a lot of reasons you might go back to your toxic relationship. One may be because you love the person so much that you're willing to put yourself through that toxic cycle over and over again. Another may be because you think the days that are good are worth all the bad, toxic ones. Sometimes, we have to look deeper into ourselves too because we may think we deserve the treatment our partner gives us, therefore a large factor of this becomes our personal insecurities. And yet another reason also can be the fact that we don't want to be alone/

Feeling like you deserve the treatment that you're receiving, not knowing what a healthy relationship looks like, being scared of change, not knowing how to be comfortably alone with yourself and being alone with your feelings. Could also be that you've desperately put a lot of work into the relationship and don't want to let it go for fear that someone else could end up getting what you feel you've work so hard to get to. Not wanting to let go of the memories of and with that person so you conitinue to stay in the relationship despit knowing its not good for you