Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

I'm dating someone who has been cheated on. What should I do?

Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Aug 18, 2017
...read more
Just be honest and be truthful with the relationship. This person has been through a traumatic time, by showing you are trustworthy and loving, you can rebuild the person's trust.
Struggling with Breakups?
Find relief with 7 Cups online therapy.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Aug 19, 2017
...read more
Show them that you are different, but also remember your self-worth. You are not their previous partner.
Profile: animalsmakemesmile
animalsmakemesmile on Sep 1, 2017
...read more
As someone who was previously dating a serial cheater, I think patience is a strength that you will need. You will need to build trust with the person. From someone that has been cheated on before... a break in trust will open the floodgates to so much emotion. In my experience, even if there is a minor break in trust, I question if I want to continue the relationship at all, because I know I won't be able to handle the anxiety and 'what ifs'. Communication is so important. Your partner doesn't need to know your EVERY move (this is definitely unhealthy), but saying your are going to bed when you really are going out with your pals is a really bad idea. I got so good at spotting lies in my previous partner, that I can almost immediately tell when my current partner is lying. Although he has never cheated on me and I doubt he would, even white lies (for me) trigger those horrible feelings of being cheated on. However, you also need to let them know that you need space. Considering the fact that you are dating them, you should be empathetic of their feelings and emotions. However, ultimately, your partner is responsible for working to get these under control. I had a bad habit of wanting answers NOW, or a response to my text NOW, of needing 'to have a talk' NOW. I would say that the best counter to this is to let them know a date when you will be able to talk. Give them that reassurance. Or, if your will be away from your phone for a while, let them know. Small considerations like that can go a long way.
Profile: Layla910
Layla910 on Sep 3, 2017
...read more
Communication is a big factor in a relationship! It is important that you build trust with your partner, and talk to them about your worries or concerns
Profile: PrincessMadellaa
PrincessMadellaa on Sep 14, 2017
...read more
Try your best to earn their trust. It will take them a while but be patients and they'll come around
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Sep 21, 2017
...read more
The best thing to do when you are dating someone who has been cheated on is to assure him/her that you won't do that to him/her. Not every person is the same and you just have to tell him/her to trust you and to believe that you are not capable of cheating on him/her just like what his/her previous partner did.
Profile: DreamsOfWonders21
DreamsOfWonders21 on Oct 22, 2017
...read more
Tell them you love them everyday and night and let them know you will never be like their ex. Their ex lost someone who would've been their world but know their yours.
Profile: MissNatureNat
MissNatureNat on Nov 11, 2017
...read more
Show them that you are not going to cheat. It will take time to build up their trust but if you stick with them and be patient and show them that you are trustworthy, they will start to trust you. try and show them empathy, tell them how you would feel if it was you in their situation. Its not easy to trust when you have been let down in the past.
Profile: Lexshinmiri908
Lexshinmiri908 on Nov 17, 2017
...read more
Try to make the person feel more comfortable by reassuring them a lot about your relationship and feelings. Don't give up on them when they're giving you a tough time because they may have trust issues from previous experience. Have tons of patience and take things slowly for them. (:
Profile: ezraleeeee
ezraleeeee on Nov 17, 2017
...read more
The psychological trauma that a person endures after being cheated on is one of the most emotionally damaging things that a person can go through. Give them patience, give them reassurance. When they ask questions, it's not because they don't trust you, they've been hurt before and that these are the things they need to know in order to keep them from overthinking and reverting back into their depressive state. They probably are going to get jealous, have low self-esteem and are quite afraid. And again, this isn't an indication that they don't trust you, they just need your reassurance and patience.
Have a helpful insight? Don’t keep it to yourself.
Sharing helps others and its therapeutic for you.
0/150 Minimum Characters
0/75 Minimum Words