I can't get over my divorce. What should I do?

It's a process that's extremely tough from start to finish, and you can still feel emotional weeks, months, and even years after the divorce. The residual anger, hurt, confusion, depression, and even self-blame don't just disappear once a divorce is finalized. Give yourself a break take a holiday maybe-or to take up a new hobby like yoga, mediation, or skateboarding.Take time out to exercise, eat well and relax. Keep to your normal routines as much as possible. Try to avoid making major decisions or changes in life plans. Don’t use alcohol, drugs, or cigarettes as a way to cope; they only lead to more problems. Believe in yourself and keep going. Love yourself, you don't need others' approval, and don't let them validate your emotions.

Hey there! Going through a divorce is a painful experience for many. It is normal to feel lost and lonely during this time. At the same time, it opens up doors to give ourselves more time to explore hobbies and pastimes that we previously couldn't give time to. Spending time with other friends and relatives is a good way of spending time too! Of course, the pain after a divorce is real, and only with effort and time, can you put it behind you. Apart from the suggestions mentioned, it is also a good idea to journal your thoughts, perhaps every night before sleep. With time, you can look back at your path of thinking and reflect on it. I wish you the best of luck, I know you will make through this!

A divorce can be a traumatic event. We are faced with the end of a very important relationship, one that we may have foreseen never to end. One way someone might work towards healing from this kind of devastation is by sitting with the feelings we have. We might feel regret, relief, anger, a sense of loss of purpose and identity, and so many other feelings, as well. It is also important to journal about it or talk to someone, so that what we are feeling does not stay inside us. We can share it to lessen our pain about it. Also finding new hobbies might help to distract from the pain. Self care is a way to tell ourselves it will be okay.

At this point you may have come to the realization that getting over divorce is a lot more complicated than you thought. In fact, you may be asking yourself, “How long am I going to feel like this?” When am I going to start feeling better? Why can’t I stop obsessing over this divorce? Why did he do that? Why didn’t I do this? What they are doing now?” Those are normal questions after divorce. Useless, but normal. They will NOT help you in your journey of getting over divorce. But hopefully you’re also saying, “I want my life back! Help!” Here are three things you must do right off the bat to get through divorce. Accept the reality of your divorce Make the decision to take control Do small actions every day to create the life you want– for me. Just know that there is help and your life could be better if you go out and seek the help.

A divorce is a difficult time for both parties when each individual experiences the loss of their relationship. However it is an experience that many go through and can find a common connection within one another. Overcoming the challenge of change is not easy, but the lack of ease means that you care deeply. In life that is a good thing and will get you through every feat no matter how immense it feels. “In our lives, change is unavoidable, loss is unavoidable. In the adaptability and ease with which we experience change, lies our happiness and freedom.” -The Buddha

Look to the future and not the past; use this time to strengthen your mind and body by joining a gym or any other physical activity that is social. This will enable you to physically get up and avoid thinking on your divorce while working towards getting healthy. Talk to the others you meet at the gym and make a new social group for yourself. Another suggestion is joining anything that you are interested in hobby-wise. Surrounding yourself with new people that share your interests while enjoying yourself in regards of a hobby will reduce the time you are thinking about something negative. This is not an easy feat to accomplish but when you mix staying busy and time; you will find yourself in a new and beautiful next chapter of your life.

Getting over a divorce is really difficult. It is similar to a death because it really is the death of your marriage. Going through the grief process is individualized and it will take time for your heart to heal. I was divorced and couldn't get over it either. When I finally understood that my ex had moved on and I was stuck and only hurting myself, it helped me finish moving through those necessary stages of grief. Time doesn't heal all wounds, but it does allow distance to create your new normal. In doing so, you will be able to see the lessons in your pain and share that with other people.

Consider changing the metaphor for a start. To “get over” something implies that it’s something huge, like a fence or a mountain. Without doing, thinking or feeling anything else for a moment and just looking at the wording, how can you change the metaphor from ”getting over” into something else? This can be a start on the path to change, because we sometimes encode our thoughts and feelings into internal pictures (“metaphors”) and words. Changing the wording can change the internal, which subsequently can change the emotions, actions, and general outlook on what you can’t do – and what you can.

When one feels like you cannot get over something so big. I would recommend many things in sinergy, and one picks which ones they want to do. For example I would say: Go to therapy to solve unsolved issues, go and remember what you used to like doing so much before being in a relationship with that person, read books for self help in this topic, go out with friends (if you dont have try to make new ones doing the things you would like to do then you will meet people with the same interests as you), do not put pressure on yourself to go on dating again, just take time to fall in love with yourself first.

What I've learned from my personal experience is you have to focus on yourself. Focus on what you can control which is your behaviors, thoughts, and responses. Enriching your self-efficacy will mitigate cognitive distortions. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques really helped me with identifying my triggers and effective coping mechanisms. Furthermore, what's really important is to understand you will have negative thoughts or feelings, however, you can control how you respond to them. Far too often individuals seek to eliminate symptoms of any diagnosis they may have when the focus should be on managing them. What do you want in your future? Not for anyone else but yourself? Set small goals that you can accomplish and it will greatly improve your mood. Catch yourself ruminating about your marriage and actively push those thoughts away by distracting yourself with another activity. sounds cliche, but it does get better. At one point I didn't think it would either and I was hyper-focused on getting someone back who didn't deserve me. You're worth it and if someone doesn't see that, then they don't deserve you anyway.