I can't get over my divorce. What should I do?

At this point you may have come to the realization that getting over divorce is a lot more complicated than you thought. In fact, you may be asking yourself, “How long am I going to feel like this?” When am I going to start feeling better? Why can’t I stop obsessing over this divorce? Why did he do that? Why didn’t I do this? What they are doing now?” Those are normal questions after divorce. Useless, but normal. They will NOT help you in your journey of getting over divorce. But hopefully you’re also saying, “I want my life back! Help!” Here are three things you must do right off the bat to get through divorce. Accept the reality of your divorce Make the decision to take control Do small actions every day to create the life you want

I believe the first thing you need to realize is that you are capable of living a life and be happy without your partner. Think about the things that make you happy, and try to keep your mind occupied doing activities that make you feel good about yourself, otherwise you'll just think about your ex. Don't start looking for love right away, it will come when you're ready. You are much more than a wife/husband, you are a human being capable of achieving many things. Please also remember love is everywhere, not just in a partner.

Everything happens for a reason. God will never put you through this pain unless he has something more to plan out for you in the future :)

I look at divorce as almost like a death. That person is not there any longer, for whatever reason, even if you parted on good terms. It's still a loss. Your life will completely change and you may feel like you have lost part of yourself and not know who you really are anymore. For me, I found new friends, tried new hobbies, kept a diary and had a strong support system. It was a process of a few years for me to reinvent myself, correct things about myself that I really didn't like and just really learn to like myself. Don't rush....because it's certainly not a race and it's important to feel comfortable through the healing process. You may feel vulnerable and helpless and fell like you NEED someone, but you really need YOU and for YOU to be healthy. Fill your life with things that are uplifting and positive and you will be amazed at your progress!

What part of the divorce is difficult for you to get over? Is it that you feel it should have worked out because of all the effort you feel you put in or was it a shock and now you find yourself back at square one with a bunch of unanswered questions?

What you shouldn't do rather, is try and force any change. I think professional help is good, as they will properly guide you through the deeper underlying issues behind the stuck feelings. I think every obstacle is an opportunity to get closer and more intimate with oneself, and therefore provide an opportunity to grow in character, spiritually, morally, intellectually, empathically etc.. Gd luck!!

A divorce is a life changing aspect of one's life. It is not something to be forgotten nor is it something that is easy to get over. It is possible to get over, but in no means is it nessisary or even more productive to get over the divorce. What will help is to come to terms that a large portion of your life has changed but allow your self to find a new normal and grow from your experiences.

First realize that a divorce is not a simple thing to adjust to. You need to give yourself time to grieve the loss of that relationship, and pressuring yourself to "get over" it isn't helpful. Would you tell someone who lost an arm to "get over" it? Of course not. You need time to learn how to function in a new way and make life work with what you've got! I hope you find peace.

It's time now for you to do a couple of things: 1) Talk. Talk to as many people as will listen about how you feel. You need to get it out. 2) Evaluate for yourself what you want in your life and what you don't want. You just went through a traumatic experience and your evaluation of those two things will help you decide where to take your life from here 3) FORGIVE YOURSELF - you are only human.

Start some new activities. You need to get over that fact that it happened. You probably feel fear translated into regret which can only be surpassed with sheer distraction and peace off mind. Because of this, hobbies are a great for of time occupation. Do yoga; exercise; meditate; sing; do some squats; write; breath (and this one i strongly suggest - learning how to do this may require practice); Start dating again when you're ready; have a makeover; remodel your home; read a book; become the cook you've always wanted to be... Distraction is key.... And in some time you will realize that these bad thoughts lingering on your divorce are fading, and you no longer will need them. Good luck.