How do I stop blaming myself?

Start looking at yourself in a positive light. You may have had your faults or made some mistakes but you shouldn't allow yourseld to continue feeling guilty. What's in the past cannot be changed and there's no use pondering on it, the only thing to do is learn from the mistakes made and move forward

Are you sure you haven't been gaslighted ? Usually victims of emotional abuse tend to blame themselves because they internalize a lot of toxicity from their abuser, and that remains to be healed which is why self blaming and self defeating thoughts tend to pop in the mind. Having been through this myself, I could help if you want to reach out but it would well be worth it to have a read about a certain subject called - gaslighting.

You have to learn that not everything is your fault. One day in class, the question of the day was "who do you think most deserves an apology from you?" and I realized one day that it was me. I deserved an apology from myself. For always blaming myself for everything. For always being disappointed in myself for things I can't even control. It takes time, but you have to accept yourself and your flaws. Also learn that you can't always control certain situations.

To stop blaming yourself look at ways it wasn’t your fault. REMEBER that you are you and you are perfect.

Learn that EVERYONE makes mistakes and to forgive yourself. Based on personal experience, you have to understand what you blame yourself for and work to figure out what are some different options you can take. If you blame yourself for missing a work assignment, ask yourself why you missed it and how you can stay on task for next time - phone reminder, sticky notes etc. If you're blaming yourself for personal things - perhaps consider meeting with someone in person that can do more hands on activities to get your to a point where you can realize where the blame comes from and why.