How do I know if I'm in a toxic relationship?

If the person you are with doesn’t respect you and your decisions. They always try to control you and take decisions for you. When you have to ask them for permission to do any little thing in your life. When they don’t consider your opinions and impose their decisions on you. When they don’t trust you and always suspect that you’re cheating on them. When they won’t let you meet people specially people from the opposite gender. When they don’t let you make choices or restrict you from wearing certain type of clothes or stopping you from doing certain kind of activity and when they keep hurting you physically and emotionally

This is an excellent question. It is important to know how to identify toxic relationships so that you can set better boundaries and engage in healthier relationships. Toxic relationships can take many forms. Luckily, there are some traits or red flags that can help differentiate a toxic relationship from a healthy relationship. Some red flags of toxic relationships include: 1) one person isolating the other person from their friends, family, or support system, 2) a dynamic of constant distrust, blame, or hurt, 3) a person having to hide who they are to "win" the other person's approval, and 4) nonconsensual interactions or a lack of respect for healthy boundaries whether they are physical, sexual, emotional, or temporal. Toxic relationships often also feel draining or harmful, and have a net negative effect on a person's self esteem. A toxic relationship is usually marked by destructive conflict, that is, conflict which is harmful, tears people down, and does not leave room for multiple opinions or schools of thought. The conflict might arise between the two people outwardly, or it may arise internally, within one person, as that person realizes their opinions, will, actions, and/or emotions are not respected by the other person. If you feel you may be in a toxic relationship but are unsure, it could help to reflect on the most consistent aspects of the relationship with respect to the above listed traits and red flags, and to determine the relationship's net effect on both participants.

I think it is important to ask yourself these questions: do I feel anxious or afraid when spending alone time with my partner? Do I find myself walking on eggshells around them to try and avoid a conflict? Do I feel like my partner respects me? Would I feel comfortable saying no to them? If somebody I cared about were in a relationship identical to mine, how would I feel about their partner? Healthy relationships are all about comfort, communication, compromise, care, and if you feel any of that is lacking it may be time to reevaluate your relationship and consider reaching out for help.

in many cases, the indicators of a toxic relationship are much more subtle. The first, and simplest, is persistent unhappiness, Glass says. If a relationship stops bringing joy, and instead consistently makes you feel sad, angry, anxious or “resigned, like you've sold out,” It’s a common refrain: relationships are hard work. Fights are normal and rough patches are par for the course. True as that may be, however, these platitudes can distract from legitimate causes for concern in one’s social and romantic life — including signs that a relationship may have become, or always was, toxic. Here’s what you need to know about toxic relationships, and how to tell if you’re in one. What is a toxic relationship? Dr. Lillian Glass, a California-based communication and psychology expert who says she coined the term in her 1995 book Toxic People, defines a toxic relationship as “any relationship [between people who] don’t support each other, where there’s conflict and one seeks to undermine the other, where there’s competition, where there’s disrespect and a lack of cohesiveness.” While every relationship goes through ups and downs, Glass says a toxic relationship is consistently unpleasant and draining for the people in it, to the point that negative moments outweigh and outnumber the positive ones. Dr. Kristen Fuller, a California-based family medicine physician who specializes in mental health, adds that toxic relationships are mentally, emotionally and possibly even physically damaging to one or both participants. And these relationships don’t have to be romantic: Glass says friendly, familial and professional relationships can all be toxic as well. What makes a relationship toxic? Fuller says people who consistently undermine or cause harm to a partner — whether intentionally or not — often have a reason for their behavior, even if it’s subconscious. “Maybe they were in a toxic relationship, either romantically or as a child. Maybe they didn’t have the most supportive, loving upbringing,” Fuller says. “They could have been bullied in school. They could be suffering from an undiagnosed mental health disorder, such as depression or anxiety or bipolar disorder, an eating disorder, any form of trauma.”

If they do not spend enough time with you, treat you well Or if they constantly hurt you with their actions or do not encourage you to follow your dreams, then you might be in a toxic relationship. These questions are questions that everyone in a relationship should ask themselves, am i happy? Do they make me feel home or loved? Do they show the same effort as i do? Do they hurt me constantly? Do they control everything i do? if you feel like you’re in a toxic relationship then do yourself a favor and ask yourself these questions.

When you do not feel comfortable in that relationship, when you feel like you give more than you take. When this relationship breaks you down and makes you depressed instead of lifting you up and making you happy. When the one you're in a relationship with doesn't respect you, or even abuse you. Nobody deserves to be treated this way. Sometimes in our lives we get stuck in toxic relationships because we think this is what we deserve or what's is available at the moment. But no, never degrade yourself to be in such a relationship, you deserve to be loved, cared about and respected.

If you feel drained after the conversation, for example if it is a one sided conversation, or that for everytime you try to express yourself they start shaming, judging or even telling you that you doing something wrong when you are only stating how you feel about something. Toxicity might be someone who always plays the victim and make you feel bad about thing you did not do, or you something you did and they manipulate it so they are the victim and you are the villain which would make you feel bad, drained. Keep in mind that most toxic relationships are not easy to get out of, they make you feel that you need them, that they are good for you, that you can’t live without them. When in reality it is the opposite, it might be hard at the beginning because after being in a toxic relationship for a while you get used to the poison as your body is now addicted to it. But remember that no matter how hard it is to quit your addiction, it is always the best thing you can do!

In my experience, being in a toxic relationship involves several factors. Possibly the two worst-case scenarios of a toxic relationship is physical and verbal abuse. If you are being verbally abused or physically abused, it is best to seek help and to try to get out of that situation as soon as possible. Another indicator of being of in a toxic relationship is feeling bad all the time and having some sort of animosity to your significant other or the other person involved in your relationship whether it be a family member or friend. If you are in a relationship where you are doing all the giving and they are doing all the taking without any reciprocation, then this is another sign of a toxic relationship. It is not possible for a relationship to last without equal work being put in by both partners. One other indicator is the creation of a "score card", where one or both parties keep score of what each person does wrong, and brings the score up in arguments. A person may say they forgive a mishap, but in their mind they may keep the score in their mind to bring up into a later argument. When these mishaps are brought up over and over again, it will slowly destroy the relationship and can be seen and used as manipulative against the other person. One final indicator is that nothing gets resolved. When a conflict arises, it will always end up in an argument because nothing is going through with a calm demeanor. The conflict turning into an argument can turn into resentment for one another. These are only a few basic principles of a toxic relationship and there are many more. I've stated these principle's because these are the things I experienced in one of my previous relationships. In the end, if it is not possible to fix a toxic relationship, then it might be best for both parties to move on and go their separate ways.

Based on my personal experience, I realized I am in a toxic relationship when was not happy anymore being with that person. Originally, when I was with that person, I was genuinely happy and excited. However, from this specific time, I began to feel sad and suspicious whenever I was with that person. It was quite depressing to me at first that I don't feel the kind of happiness that I felt before, but I soon realized that I'm in a toxic relationship. Also, I felt it when I noticed that person is effortless when he/she was spending time with me.

There are many, many forms of toxic relationship scenarios. Whether it’s emotional, physical, sexual, mental, verbal, etc. The ones that are harder to detect is emotional and mental (usually). First of all, you might want to try and detect what area they are being toxic in. If it’s verbal, mental, emotional, etc., or a mix of a few areas. From my experience, the best way to tell is if you feel awful after being around that person. If they gaslight you, put you down, are passive aggressive, etc. towards you, that’s a big sign. Another is when they have a “mother knows best” attitude. They feel they need to be in control and act like they know what is best for you. I would recommend doing research on different abusive/toxic relationships so it is easier to tell if you are in one. Hope this helps!