Why do I always fail even when I try my hardest?

Sometimes the only way we learn is by failing. You know how children when they begin to walk fall. They try their best but end up falling, there parents even try to knock them down at some points because they'll be chaotic when they're up. But during that time they will fall by themselves but they pick themselves up right? well that's how they learn. We're the same, you know when you fall over, do you just stay on the floor? no, you pick yourself up and keep walking. I know you're probably like, it's easy for her to say, but I mean it, once we pick ourselves up once, it'll become easy and like a habit. The world will test you brutally and push you down, but you shouldn't surrender and try harder, but don't forget yourself, whilst you do because that will affect you worse than all.

I can't imagine how difficult it would feel to feel like you always fail even when you try. I want to commend you for trying over and over again - that is really admirable that you are willing to keep going. Trying when stuff gets hard shows what a strong person you are and I really respect that. I would like to know more about what you feel like is "failing" do you think you could tell me more about that? Feel free to reach out and message me or another listener here on 7cups for support if you want to talk more.

We don't fail always when we try our hardest. It is when we feel failure because everything didnt go as we planned...like, you may have thought of a project that you could hardly get done. But when you could really get it done perfectly after trying your hardest you might have thought of some praises from people which you didn't get...so you starts thinking "It was not a success enough i must have been a failure always." Another thing I can say from my experience, most of the time we lose our energy thinking about trying or working hard on something before actually getting it done. So it may feel like we were trying our hardest but actually it was only the "hardest" made by our thoughts...not the "best"!

From my perspective, failure is a matter of point of view. Trying your hardest is already a huge success as most people never go this far. Failure is a success in itself as you learn, experience after experience, what works and what does not. Most people never learn how good success feels because they have not failed enough. Failing builds strong mental values, leading to more intense and rewarding successes than if you had not failed. Failure is a mentor. You can decide to deny its lessons or you can take them, accept them, and adapt. You will then discover your previous hardest was just a tiny sample of your full potential.

Do we fail always? Can someone fail always? In a day we have so many little things, or little more greater things to accomplish and all these little and big events are part of our life. To use the word "always" seems to me already so definite. "Always" defines something that is not rooted in real life, but rather in perception and interpretation. We can pose huge tasks in front of us and feel that we are failing if we do not do everything that we imagined to do. We can keep being not happy with little things that we accomplish. We can keep refusing the fact that the life is about small moments and that attitude about those small moments can make us or break us. We all can and should fail sometimes and that is ok. Do we fail ALWAYS? If we make a big research and interview all people in the whole wide world my hypothesis is that we can not find that person. Try your hardest to live your dreams, but try not to be unhappy when you do not accomplish all your dreams. Dreams should be bigger than our life. Let us grade ourselves based on the many things that we do and accomplish throughout our lives, and do not suffer because we did not accomplish something. Live in the moment, move, breath, greet, acknowledge, share, love, run, cook, hug, talk, write, read, do, be...Among thousands things that you do you can not be the one that fails always. Nobody can.

Many people feel like they try really hard all the time and they can never get things right. A lot of times this happens to people in school or at work. Trying to succeed can be a hard thing for anyone. A lot of times people try to impress their parents or loved ones and it never works out for them. Many people experience failure and disappointment but it is important how they react to that. Sometimes it is tricky to see the best way we can succeed but failing comes with a lot of lessons that you can use to succeed as along as you keep on Trying like you do now.

Even though we put all of our efforts into one thing, the outcome can be the opposite of what we expect. When we fail, it does not define who we are, but is a reason. No matter how hard we try, we will encounter failure, and its not about how many times we fall, but how we get back up and persevere. It's a test to see if we give up or if we continue to fight. Even if the path ahead seems impossible, no matter how many obstacles we encounter, we will reach our destination with time and experience.

I hate to sound like a self-help guru. But there is no failure unless you stop trying. Every failure will provide you a chance to improve and learn. A lot of time it is your mindset that pushes you to the cul-de-sac. Whenever you think you have hit a wall, pause. Don't guilt yourself and stay in the negative headspace. There has to be something you can salvage from the mess of your "failure". Things are not good or bad. It is your own opinion makes you feel that way. Analysize and try again. One day when you look back, you may think I am glad that I didn't succeed at the first try. Or I would have achieved as much as now. Rinse and repeat till you get there.

Honestly, I have no idea I swear since I could remember I would work my butt of in class but when it came to exams and assignments it didn't reflect my hard work in the classroom. I was one of those people who did the prep and always knew the answer but my grades don't reflect that and it hurts. I wish i knew why this was always the case. It hurts and make me feel like I'm not smart enough and compares to people i know it make me feel stupid. I'm actually nervous to apply for a post grad because it doesn't look like I worked hard because of my grades even though I did work hard... probably not hard enough. I wish I knew why.

Failure is really hard to stomach, especially when it's school related, for me those used to and still hurt the most, but sometimes it's not effort alone that helps us succeed, its also how we make that effort. You may be trying really hard, but are you following the rules?, are putting all your effort in a particular place and not putting enough somewhere else?. Honestly, no matter how hard we work we never really know if it'll make us pass or keep failing, but it is important that you keep moving forward, that failure isnt going to last forever.. find a way through it, because like me, you definitely can, and you will :). Go over what you may not be doing right, re-strategise, dont just do the same thing all over again. Trust me, you'll find some better results, im rooting for you!