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How can I convince myself that my friends don't hate me? I have this irrational fear that they actually hate me.

Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Aug 24, 2018
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There is a Mindfulness Practice called "Radical Acceptance". What it teaches is to allow whatever happens to be OK. So, if you are feeling fear, that's OK; do nothing in response but just notice that. If you are having thoughts attached to a feeling, that's OK; do nothing in response but just notice that. Then do your best to guide your behaviors with the Wise Mind, which is the part of yourself that understands that these fears and thoughts are not necessarily true or actual. DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) is one of the ways in which people can learn to manage thoughts and emotions more Wisely. i hope you find a way towards Acceptance, and a friendlier world!
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Profile: ZionsDen
ZionsDen on Jul 31, 2016
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You can look at the things that they do for you, however small, like asking you to come out, spending time with you, talking when you are upset. Small things like that show you that your friends do care about you, as they wouldn't do it or they would be reluctant to if they didn't enjoy your company.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Aug 12, 2016
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If you're friends are hanging out with you, talking to you. They don't hate you. People that hate people won't hang out or talk to people they hate.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Aug 18, 2016
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To put it simply, if they're your friends, they don't hate you. People don't stay somewhere they don't want to be, even if they're doing it for a stupid reason. Friends are friends
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Sep 7, 2016
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People who chose to spend their time with you definitely have positive feelings towards you. You chose your friends by liking them, and your friends have the same way.
Profile: ThePosea
ThePosea on Oct 6, 2016
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It mind sound obvious and maybe it doesn't answer your question, but if they really did hate you they wouldn't be your friends, except if they are scared of you or something, but i'm guessing that isn't the case.
Profile: tranquilDay37
tranquilDay37 on Oct 14, 2016
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What others think of you is a reflection of themselves. It might actually mean they dislike themselves. Otherwise, it really could just be that you're afraid of losing good people. I say be honest that you're afraid of them coming to dislike you and would feel better if they could remind you that they care about you occasionally.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 29, 2017
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When I feel this way about myself I remember that my perspective is just as biased as anyone else's is - we all have these internal biases about the world around us, and our own view of ourselves isn't any different. Just because you believe something about yourself doesn't make it true, you have trained yourself to respond in this way. And just like you trained yourself to think negative thoughts, you have to work to train yourself out of it! Every time you tell yourself that your friends hate you, remind yourself of a time a friend showed they cared or a time you enjoyed with a friend. Never let these negative thoughts win - always combat it with an argument!
Profile: avanef
avanef on Feb 1, 2017
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Having those thoughts are rather normal, it's not really a 'perfectionist' or wanting people to like me kind of thing going on, everyone kind of feels this way here and there. I think the best thing for you is to talk to them about it, it'll help you reassure your feeling and you know you can also spot some red flags here and there. The thing is, if they do hate you, find ways to fix it or leave them. If they don't hate you, then don't worry, you will be okay and here's the thing, friends are always going to be there, new and old, and you'll have a constant change of some with friends, who knows.
Profile: generousStrawberry38
generousStrawberry38 on Sep 8, 2017
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If they hated you, they wouldn't be your friend and associate themselves with you, so the fact that you can call them you friends means they don't hate you.
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