How do I learn to engage with people again after years of isolated drinking and using?

Listen and ask probing questions that allow the talker to open up. During pauses I would hold back a little because I you stay silent for just a little bit they have a better chance of getting things off their chest. And it’s like Zig Ziglar said, “people like to hear themselves talk 90% more than they like to listen”. If someone wants to call a listening hotline they don’t want to just hear someone else talk about themselves. I know when I have any issues and I go to a counselor I want her to lead me to me solution, not tell me what to do.