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How can I stop drinking or taking drugs?

Profile: Ioana05
Ioana05 on Aug 2, 2020
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A method that helps many people in this situation is thinking about the reason why this is affecting the quality of your life and others. One good first and easy step is reading a book or an article about this situation, from specialised people. It might not sound much, but it fan take you on the right path. Going for a total detox from the first time is a harsh step. If you decide on this, the people around you might help, by keeping you motivating and supporting your decision. It is awesome that you decided to reach for help, and I am sure that you will get the support
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Profile: CreativeSunshine2232
CreativeSunshine2232 on Dec 6, 2020
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You need to find satisfaction in life and in the things you're doing. The trick is to infuse the knowledge of all of the essential relationships into or lives in a way that dissolves the barriers of ignorance. What goes around, comes around. This simple sentence keeps you from making false assumptions about what to do. Another help is to stay out of your own recovery. Do not try to manage your own recovery under any circumstance. Get help from others who have achieved a time away from addiction and do as they tell you. Seek out help and recognize that addiction is a disease!
Profile: CoraCrowe
CoraCrowe on Dec 30, 2020
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I found a beautiful, gentle yet compelling take on starting the process of managing potential addictions. It is by Jessica Dore. I have pasted the body of the article below for anyone who is interested. I got my start in psychology working for a publisher of books about behavioral therapies, counseling techniques that target behavior change specifically, rather than healing relational dynamics or making the unconscious conscious, as some other therapies do. I learned a lot about the mechanics of behavior and particularly the interplay between thoughts, feelings and action, and I use these ideas a lot in my work. I've grown more critical of these therapies over the years, because of the way they’re so often used in mental health settings to prop up capitalist ideas of functioning. The goal is observable behavior change, so treatment targets are usually things that will give an appearance of wellness, but might ultimately be more about smoothing over post-traumatic stress symptoms that disrupt a person’s ability to go to work, for example. There’s also a hyper individualistic tone to these therapies; they tend to put the onus of change on the individual rather than attend to environmental reasons why a person might be experiencing symptoms of mental illness. I relate a lot to The Hermit, though, who walks the Middle Path but is never neutral, and who sees the half-truth nature in all things and still knows when to say yes and when to say no. The Hermit is good at finding where the medicine is and offering it in the right place and time. Since behavioral therapies are based on the science of behavior change, they can be powerful aids when change is needed. Used in the right context with the right intention, we can extract the active ingredients from them and use them to do magic. If you’ve followed my work for a while you may be familiar with acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), which is a behavioral therapy. The idea of ACT is basically that you determine what’s important to you and then commit to taking actions that hold you in line with what you’ve deemed precious. Your values live in any domain of life that you care about, so you probably have values related to family, creative life, health, community and so forth. So in therapeutic work, you might identify the top domains of life that are important to you, and then you define your values in each. Once you've determined what matters to you, then begins the real work. You start to figure out what internal experiences—fear, grief, guilt, anxiety, self-doubt—you'll need to accept in order to stay committed to those values. Since many times it’s the things we’re not willing to feel that keep us stuck in patterns that don't work, ACT helps us learn to work with those. It's about learning to accept feelings we're scared of so we can live better. Now remember, this is a behavioral therapy. It's about doing, not about saying. So I’ll give an example. You’re a white person who says you value Justice. There are tons of us out here saying that. In therapy, we aren't allowed to be that vague because it’s not going to help us make real change, so you’ll have to get a bit more granular: In 2016, the net worth of a typical white family in America was ten times that of the typical Black family—about $171K and $17K respectively. And even though you know capitalism is inherently violent and anti-social, you accept that it’s the system we’re all having to exist in. You determine that you value wealth equality, which means that you want to live in a world where Black people have as much access to money and resources as whites do. But it’s not enough for you to say you want a world like this. Values are not abstract things, but guides for action. There’s even a tool in ACT where a person asks themselves “will this behavior bring me closer to or further away from what matters to me?” like a compass. A lot of things in life are not that cut and dry, but you get the point. And just like it generally would not be considered progress for you to go into a therapy room week after week and say “I’d love to stop doing xyz” while you continue to go home and do xyz every night, it is not enough to say “I want wealth to be distributed fairly” and then do nothing to actually challenge the way it’s distributed now. I’m using one example of a value, one that speaks to people with class privilege and surplus resources to share, but there are so many. Whatever the area is where we can take direct action to align with the values we claim, we can apply the idea of values as behavioral and not simply ideological. Let’s talk a bit more about what ambivalence is. As you read, think about it in the context of social change. Ambivalence is a psychological process that hinders momentum, direction and persistence. People who are ambivalent tend to feel stuck and sometimes hopeless and are often inconsistent in their decisions and behavioral patterns, in what they say they want and what they do, and in their perspectives and emotions. Ambivalent people are often very inconsistent, they may get excited about a change but lack persistence and stamina to follow through over the long haul. According to Wagner, Ingersoll & Rollnick (2012) ambivalence has cognitive, emotional and behavioral components. Ambivalent people often toggle back and forth between continuing to live as they were and wanting to try something new. One minute they might say “I have to do better” and then a week later forget all about the thing they swore they’d work on. They tend to get super excited about new ideas and prospects and feel high levels of confidence around their ability to execute, while also holding intense dread, anxiety or consuming grief around letting go the comfort of what they’ll be forced to leave behind. Sometimes they experience such debilitating guilt and shame about the choices they’ve made; unable to process those feelings they ultimately choose to do nothing at all. And when it comes to taking action, ambivalent people sometimes take intense but inconsistent steps forward, unsure about whether they’re in this thing really, and then falling back at the first sign of hardship. Some are impatient and unrealistic about the changes to be made, expecting it to come swiftly as if by magic. Upon realizing that it just doesn’t work that way, relapse is common in the ambivalent. Miller & Arkowitz (2015) write that “ambivalence is a normal and common human condition whereby people simultaneously want and do not want something.” It’s a common sticking point in psychotherapeutic work because change involves uncertainty and people are naturally resistant to the unknown. In order to have honest conversations about racial justice, I think we have to address the fact that many white people are ambivalent about giving up our existing way of life in favor of one that looks more equitable and just. We’ve lived this way our whole lives and a lot of us don’t have good skills for engaging mystery. As a recovering highly self-critical person, I want to say that this identification of ambivalence is not to judge, scorn or berate, though I do think shame serves an important function in social change. It is to apply what we know about the process of change in individuals to the larger ecosystem to which we all belong, so that we can identify what’s keeping us stuck and what we can do about it. If you got into therapy to address a drinking problem, stated that you’d like to stop drinking and acknowledge the ways in which it would benefit your life but continued to show up week after week with a hangover, your therapist would say you are ambivalent about recovery. That’s because declaring what’s important to you is a mere first step in the change process, an entryway to the work itself. Why, then, do so many of us as white people believe that it is sufficient to proclaim our values on social media—whether it’s about anti-Black police violence, human rights violations in immigrant detention centers, or income and health disparities—without taking any real action, and think that’s enough? We have good data over years of studying behavior change about how to address this exact problem. There are gobs of scientific studies on ambivalence and how to overcome it. Interventions designed to address it are built into a lot of addiction recovery programs because of how common it is, even when it comes to changing behaviors that are clearly destructive, life-zapping and even anti-social. We don’t need to reinvent the wheel or grasp in the dark here. But we do need to acknowledge that it’s there. That even as we say we believe in racial justice, as long as there is a part of us is that fears relinquishing our privileges, that part can and will undermine our capacity for real change. So again, values identification is the entryway to the work, not the work itself (Eight of Pentacles). It’s not enough to post a few things on social media every time a Black person gets killed by a cop and then ignore police violence every other day. It would be like going into therapy, saying what your goals are and then thinking you’re done. That would be asinine. And yet… So now that you know your values you have to start identifying what it looks like to live those things. You value wealth equality, and you also have more than you need. When you go to the grocery store you buy what you want and don’t worry about not having enough at the checkout. And while it’s probably impossible to say exactly how much of your income you owe to your privileges, you feel confident in saying it’s at least 10%. So you make a commitment to redistribute 10% of your income to Black people each month, either Black-led organizations or individuals. You've identified your values and you’ve made a commitment and now you're cooking. And where things really start to heat up is when the barriers crop up. Identifying the barriers and finding new ways to work with them is a huge part of the work in ACT. Generally what happens is, you ID your values, make a commitment to act on them, and then the procession of fear comes through. So for the white person who valued wealth equality, their fears are in the shape of scarcity, of not having enough, of being left behind, of struggle (Five of Pentacles). Maybe it’s not money you’re going to give but time, time reading and learning and listening. Or social capital, where your problematic friends are going to stop inviting you out because you speak up when you hadn’t before. If you’re interested in magic, this stuff is the prima materia that the alchemists spoke of. The base metal that you’re hoping to transmute into gold. The behavioral task is to make the values-aligned move, and to do that requires you to work differently with the fears you have about it. To notice where those fears show up in the body and what the mind does when they come up. To listen for what it tells you to do or not do. To witness thoughts and visceral reactions to the fears. To be gentle with them so they draw closer. To run the tips of your fingers across their thorns and spiky ridges. To ask where they came from. To become faintly aware of something seeping out from the small spaces of air inside your bones, like a poisonous gas. Of a very old fear that's been passed on down the line. A fear that's been waiting for the day when it would reach someone with the know-how to transmute it. You have honed your magical abilities. You have learned to work with fear. You have a chance now, to do something other than yield to it. To make the fear into a golden salve that you can use to do healing. To develop a new relationship with it, so that you can stop harming others. So that you can stop harming yourself. The spiritual task is to be with these questions: Do I believe that I am a part of an eco-system (The World)? If so, why am I hoarding what I have as if I live here alone? Why am I okay with having more than I need when people around me don’t have the basics? Why, if I personally do not want to feel scarcity and fear, am I okay with other people feeling it? Would I be willing to feel it? What are the values of my spiritual systems (The Hierophant)? To whom do I make offerings to with the living altar of my body and behavior? What are the values of the entities I worship? How do I show my devotion to them through my actions? Lots of questions. If we want change in any area of life, we have to learn to engage mystery in ways other than avoiding it. And one big certainty: It is not enough to say we want something to change if we are not willing to do the work. That is true at every level of Being. Part of both behavioral work and spiritual work is defining what the sacrifice is. The Gods don’t say, “here, do this ritual, make this sacrifice” it is the responsibility of the People to make those determinations. Privilege might have us thinking we are exempt from that dynamic. We are not. And if you’re not willing to determine what the work is, then you either don’t really want that change or you’re not understanding the mechanics of how change works. The Gods of change require earnest and consistent offerings. --
Profile: OmWeAreOne
OmWeAreOne on Jan 1, 2021
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I do not drink or use drugs. If I did and needed to stop, I would start by attending a 12 step program, working it, and I would also find support with a rehabilitation or dual diagnosis program to ensure that I had the neccessary coping skills to learn new healthy habits rather than the habits I've learned to self medicate. Having a good support team (including family and friends) creates an atmosphere for success. I would also give myself space and time in order to grow emotionally, mentally, and physically to ensure a good foundation to remain sober and experience the present moment with a clear head.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 2, 2021
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Well first off tell the people you normally do these kinds of activities with that you no longer want to do these things. IMPORTANT NOTE do not make yourself sound superior to these people or above them because they do drugs and you no not. common mistake. Telling people your goals holds you more accountable to them. Step two is do not make drugs or drinks redily available to you. the harder it is to access it the less likely you will be to get it. delete your dealers contact number off your phone. Cant buy anything from him of you contact him.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jan 6, 2021
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Recognizing that this is a problem is the first step. The next step is to talk to someone who can keep you accountable when faced with temptation to do it again. Remove the alcohol and drugs that is in your home so you won't have to look at it. Whenever you do have the urge to drink or take drugs, find another activity that you can replace it with, whether that be journaling or exercising. Replace that urge with something good. It is totally ok to have slip ups here and there, the process to recovery and healing is not a straight line but rather has ups and downs.
Profile: Jesselistens2294
Jesselistens2294 on May 6, 2021
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Deciding to overcome an addiction to alcohol or drugs could be the most important decision of your life. Once you understand that you have a problem and need help, knowing what next steps to take can be confusing. Most people don’t quit using alcohol or drugs overnight. Getting sober is a gradual process that can take weeks, months, or even years. Many people struggle with lapses and relapses throughout the course of their recovery journey, so don’t be too hard on yourself if you encounter temporary setbacks. No matter how long you have been abusing drugs or alcohol or how bad your addiction is, there are certain steps that anyone struggling with an addiction must take if they want to learn how to quit abusing drugs or alcohol, including: Committing to quitting. Determining and setting goals. Choosing a treatment plan. Getting support during treatment. Planning to live an addiction-free life. If you are committed to taking the steps necessary to quit abusing drugs or alcohol, treatment professionals and members of your support group can help you throughout the recovery process. recovery is possible, i am living proof i really hope this information helps and lastly please remeber you are worth is and never ever suffer in silence, i am here for you and everyone here on this site is so supportive reachout , save your life because you are worth it.
Profile: MeditationIV
MeditationIV on Aug 1, 2021
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Unless you feel you might be in danger, it is best to stop when you feel ready (or to practice stopping, if you feel ready for that). The all-or-nothing thinking tendency works just as poorly for other things as it does for breaking habits. If you’re in danger of an overdose or poisoning, it is best to seek proper care, and speak to somebody in a trusted clinical position. Reaching out to trusted family members and/or friends is also advisable, if you feel able and prepared to do so. For nasty habits that you recognize as detrimental to your well-being, I suggest the following: build a mental perspective that benefits your desire to stop. For example, start to cultivate a mindset that will help you recognize potentialities, such as that of you no longer needing substances (either through physical or psychological dependency). Surround yourself with thoughts, ideas, people, activities, and mindsets that lift you out of the fears, worries, and anxieties that are standing in the way of your quitting. But, lastly, don’t forget that these are BIG and incredible changes that will require significant time and patience, as well as mental durability and resilience. One step at a time. Keep loving yourself and advocating for yourself, both with others and within your own being as well. Keep fighting and good luck.
Profile: Lesmoon3
Lesmoon3 on Feb 24, 2022
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Firstly, you have to really want to stop. If you examine your motives and decide that stopping is what you are ready to do, finding someone who has walked that path before is very helpful. It could be a Twelve Step sponsor, a mentor or even a close friend who has achieved sobriety. Having someone who understands the challenges and how it feels to struggle with using thoughts, can better help you navigate those feelings. There are medical treatments available to cut down on cravings for alcohol and opiates. Investigate what will work best for you then jump in. There could be setbacks along the way, so don’t beat yourself up. Every time you slip and come back, you are stronger. Relapse does not have to be a part of your story but if it happens, be gentle on yourself. Remember, you are doing a hard thing and with anything, it does get better and easier. You are worth it and deserve to be happy!
Profile: usefulBubbles6826
usefulBubbles6826 on Mar 3, 2022
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One advice that clicked for me as an alcoholic was the following: You have to stop negotiating! The whatever substance has nothing to lose, but you have. And as long as you keep staying on the negotiating table there will - also depending on your day to day strength - always tiny doors come up for the opposite side to sneak in. Staying sober is not about somehow managing to be the 100% dominant negotiator, and putting all your energy into the negotiation to make sure you win 100%. Staying sober is actually to completely move away from that negotiating table. Take your life (which is actually subject of negotiation), stand up from that table (where you lost all the energy debating about how much is okay, which occasions are okay, what time spans of sobriety prove enough that you have it under control) and move somewhere else. That idea was a perspective shift for me.
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