I managed to stop self-harming, but then I relapsed, how can I ever stop for good?

I honestly don't know. I've done the same. I can't find the strong will to throw my razors away. I need an inspiration to stop. I think that's what everyone needs that is in this situation, a reason to quit.

Self-harm can become addictive. It may start off as an impulse or something you do to feel more in control, but soon it feels like the cutting or self-harming is controlling you. It often turns into a compulsive behaviour that seems impossible to stop. Self-harm is a way of expressing and dealing with deep distress and emotional pain. As counterintuitive as it may sound to those on the outside, hurting yourself makes you feel better. In fact, you may feel like you have no choice. Injuring yourself is the only way you know how to cope with feelings like sadness, self-loathing, emptiness, guilt, and rage. The problem is that the relief that comes from self-harming doesn’t last very long. It’s like slapping on a Band-Aid when what you really need are stitches. It may temporarily stop the bleeding, but it doesn’t fix the underlying injury. And it also creates its own problems. If you’re like most people who self-injure, you try to keep what you’re doing secret. Maybe you feel ashamed or maybe you just think that no one would understand. But hiding who you are and what you feel is a heavy burden. Ultimately, the secrecy and guilt affects your relationships with your friends and family members and the way you feel about yourself. It can make you feel even more lonely, worthless, and trapped. Talking about self-harm can be very stressful and bring up a lot of emotions. Don’t be discouraged if the situation feels worse for a short time right after sharing your secret. It’s uncomfortable to confront and change long-standing habits. But once you get past these initial challenges, you’ll start to feel better. Remember, self-harm is most often a way of dealing with emotional pain. What feelings make you want to cut or hurt yourself? Sadness? Anger? Shame? Loneliness? Guilt? Emptiness? Once you learn to recognize the feelings that trigger your need to self-injure, you can start developing healthier alternatives. •Paint, draw, or scribble on a big piece of paper with red ink or paint •Express your feelings in a journal •Compose a poem or song to say what you feel •Write down any negative feelings and then rip the paper up •Listen to music that expresses what you’re feeling •Take a bath or hot shower •Pet or cuddle with a dog or cat •Wrap yourself in a warm blanket •Massage your neck, hands, and feet •Listen to calming music •Call a friend (you don’t have to talk about self-harm) •Take a cold shower •Hold an ice cube in the crook of your arm or leg •Chew something with a very strong taste, like chili peppers, peppermint, or a grapefruit peel. •Go online to a self-help website, chat room, or message board •Exercise vigorously—run, dance, jump rope, or hit a punching bag •Punch a cushion or mattress or scream into your pillow •Squeeze a stress ball or squish Play-Doh or clay •Rip something up (sheets of paper, a magazine) •Make some noise (play an instrument, bang on pots and pans) •Use a red felt tip pen to mark where you might usually cut •Rub ice across your skin where you might usually cut •Put rubber bands on wrists, arms, or legs and snap them instead of cutting or hitting

Relapses are part of recovery, just keep trying and you will recover. Things might be hard, but things ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS get better.

It sounds like you have already had success in the past, congratulations. From what your telling me, you already have the skills to stop self-harming. What did you use before?

The best way of doing that is finding an alternative way to release your pain. You can find things that make that urge to cut go away, for instance you can run or you can jump or just draw something or call your friends, anything that does not involve you getting hurt

It's just like it is when recovering from any addiction: one day at a time. Instead of focusing on how long you will remain clean, try focusing on the accomplishment that is making it through today, that stressful paper, that fight with your friend. Just focus on little victories, and eventually you'll start noticing that they are becoming bigger victories.

Find another way to take that pain away. There's a lot of things you can try, like art, make art, draw, paint, write what you feel, let it out.

I would say try to remove all things you have self harmed with and instead of cutting you could draw on the area you cut/burn/scratch/etc. So instead of seeing painful scars you can see a beautfiul masterpiece ^w^

I think the best way is to get a stable support system and get professional help. The professionals can teach you the right way and how to keep away from it. Support will be very helpful during that time too.

Personally I us a rubble band to pop my self when I get the urge to do some thing, so the pain of the pops covers the urges and lights the urges until they are no longer an issues for me.

The road to recovery is twisty, windy, and more like a backroad--it unfortunately is not a clear path. Relapse is usually a part of this journey. Have a plan for when this happens--talk to a loved one, make yourself some chamomile tea, journal, or take a walk. Just because there is a relapse does not mean that you can't stop for good. You are absolutely worth taking that windy, twisty path. Seven Cups is also here for you, if you need additional support!

Make a commitment to yourself. Identify what first motivated you to stop. Also identify what caused you to relapse. Find a friend, loved one, or medical professional to support you through this process. Find that motivation to once again stop, and this time, make sure to more actively avoid the trigger that causes you to relapse. Treat this aggressively and proactively, and make sure to set clear goals for yourself.

In my own experience, I relapsed many times over the course of trying to stop self-harming. It was a really long journey but one day it finally set in that I deserved better than the pain I put on myself. I didn't need to scare myself anymore. I had people around me who loved and cared for me and they were a huge part of me being able to stop.

That's amazing that you were able to stop once. It's natural to have urges during a struggle such as this. It's not our urges that define us, but what we do to about those urges; even if we relapse we cannot judge or blame ourselves. We have to merely acknowledge that it happened and continue looking forward to and working towards a time in the future where it is easier for us not to relapse. We are only humans. Look at your accomplishments rather than your failures. Many would not have come as far as you have, this is amazing! You are truly brave and strong to continue seeking help with this. Simply wonderful. Continue looking for healthy distractions everywhere possible. You can do this!

Recovery is a process. Don't focus on stopping; focus on not doing it this time, then not the next, and so on. Baby steps. Good luck! (& feel free to message anytime, I got you) ❤️

The reason why it is so hard to stop self-harming is because it's a coping mechanism. An unhealthy one, yes, but still something we do to cope with our emotions. Self-harm gives us a way to externalize the pain, converting it from emotional pain to physical pain instead, as this is easier to handle. With this in mind, we need to find healthy alternative coping mechanisms to help us stop self-harm. A therapist could help you with this, but there are many coping mechanisms you could try to break this habit. For example, some people recovering from self-harm report that marking the area they want to cut with a red pen is helpful. Alternatively, one could run ice across the area. You can find some more alternative coping skills here: https://www.7cups.com/self-harm/lesson1.html

Self harming has to do with yourself. You have to want to stop first of all, and I know you do but there's always that urge in the back of your mind. You have the power to decide to do it or not. You can look up coping skills because that helped me or put motavating quotes around your house/room. You can do it!

I recommend seeking professional help if you haven't already. There are several useful coping mechanisms which I have adopted in the past. For example using an elastic band to 'ping' yourself gives a similar rush. Furthermore i'd suggest looking through some our our self help guides

Well I realized that the urge never goes away but it gets easier to cope when you have a coping technique. I started painting my legs or arms with watercolor.

Well however you stopped before might be how you can stop again. Focus on positive things that you like and remember the negative affects every time you self harm.

set goals, realize that what you are doing isn't helping and make steps to that you follow every time you want to self-harm before you do. contact 5 friends talk to a family member, write out your issue and approach it as if someone was asking you that question.

I've met a lot of people who have gone/going through what you are, it's a very stressful thing to have in the back of your mind. A lot of people never even get as far as you so that is already an amazing achievement. Usually people with that issue seem to have self loathing and it can help to find the source of the problem. So also just have too much anxiety or stress on them and it can cause A lot of loathing as well. Tell me more, maybe what you think could cause you to want to self harm?

Self harm is very hard to stop because it’s like an addiction. That’s good that you were sh free for so long. But try not to be too hard on yourself for relapsing. Relapses happen and it is part of the recovery process. Don’t let this relapse diminish your success in staying clean from sh for as long as you did. I’d say try to take it one day at a time and celebrate even the tiny milestones because every step towards stopping sh is a success. If you have a support system, then it will be good to rely on them to help hold yourself accountable

From my personal experience, the easiest way to quit is tossing out whatever item you're using at the time, and trying to stay away from said item.

You could try some coping strategies when you want to self-harm such as taking a walk, drawing, writing on yourself, or talking to a friend.

Talk to someone who use to self harm and learn what they have to do to stop from self harming. And also dig in deeper within yourself to find out why they are harming themselves

Try and take your mind off of self-harming. Play a sport, hang out with friends or even just watch a lot of Tv. Then when you feel like self harming, instead of hurting yourself find a better alternative method like a snapping a rubber band on your wrist or putting an ice cube on your wrist instead. Then after a while the urge to do it will go away and it will all be forgotten and in your past.

Trying to stop relapsing is hard work. You'll always relapse- always- and sometimes it'll be for a while. Sometimes it'll be for years. But in the end, no matter how much you want to self-harm, think about all the people you're hurting.

It is hard to take one coping mechanism to another when you have been on the first one for so long. One way to stop for good is to have s support team (family, friends, classmates, teacher, anyone who you know you can trust) so when you want to cut again they can suggest an alternative.

By continuing treatment prescribed and using positive coping mechanisms as often as possible. Try to keep a positive network of people you can contact when your coping mechanisms are not working.