My partner has anxiety and depression. He no longer likes being touched, we barely kiss, and don’t have sex anymore. He says it’s his medication. But how do I deal with feeling of unwanted/selfish?

You aren't selfish for needing his affection. It is a natural human need for us to want to be desired. One option is to practice cultivating some patience around your partner's loss of libido. Can you talk to him about your needs and how the two of you can work with his changing desire? Another option is, to reexamine the use of his medication. If you feel the medication is not helping his depression and anxiety, feel free to reach out to a functional and/or integrative physician who can help identify your partner's physiological triggers. Modern research has discovered that most depression and anxiety has multi-systemic inflammatory components that can be treated successful. Due to epigenetic factors, you aren't born with it!

I can understand a bit how you feel... sometimes medication for anxiety/depression can affect the way a person acts on intimacy with their partners, and even on sexual level in may lead to some problems, being it not being able to perform it, or taking too long to achieve the climax. Each person is different and, since I don't know you or your partner, is difficult to say the best way to deal with it, but I think you should open yourself to your partner about it. Tell him how you feel about this, don't make him feel guilty about it but try explain your side. He being ill shouldn't mean that you have to feel neglected. Have a good conversation with him and maybe he could think about trying other medication that may not have those side effects

I also face a similar situation yet on the opposite end in your partners position. Your feelings are understandable and need to be addressed by you and your partner. If they aren't it could lead to major issues in your relationship. I have been married for 5 years and have been dealing with something similar for 3 of them. Dealing with mental illness and medication can take a toll on not only the individual, but everyone around them. Patience and understanding is one of the most important things for both of you. At times there are other factors causing the issue like unhappiness in the relationship, financial issues, work issues, etc. It could be that their medication needs to be altered or changed. Majority of depression and anxiety meds have a side effect of low libido/sexual drive. As someone that can relate to your situation my best suggestion is to have a heart to heart with your partner and make a plan with them on how you two can fix the problem. I am here if you need to talk!

I see that you feel unwanted. It is not selfish. Take deep breathes and realize it is okay to want affection--and that it is okay admit this. From personal experience, understanding what you want is critical. It is never wrong to want something that makes you feel loved. Taking guided mindfulness meditation sessions helped me to not be ashamed of what I want. Nothing you want is a burden, it is simply you. In addition to this, practicing communication with those close for you can help too. Sometimes these desires may feel heavy, but sharing it to others can provide a mutual understanding.