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I tried to talk to someone about what happened to me, but they just said I should stop complaining. Are they right?

Profile: izza
izza on Sep 11, 2014
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No,If you feel like something is bothering you then the only way to feel better is by talking about it,don't take what they said literally they could of meant that you should try move forward and overcome what happened rather then just simply complaining about it.es it is easier said then done but you just need to keep trying and you will feel much better.Dont think that you should not talk about things with people because if you just bottle it up you will feel worse.Move forward and you will feel much better ,I promise :)
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Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Oct 1, 2014
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They're totally wrong and clearly not a useful person to talk to about anything important. Some people have too many issues of their own to have the patience required to listen anyone else's issues. They're not bad people, they're just not optimal listeners. Don't give up, you can find good listeners here. It's often easier to tell the big stuff to an anonymous stranger so you don't feel judged or fearful that it will come back at you in a bad way.
Profile: Teasley4031
Teasley4031 on Oct 25, 2014
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Absolutely not-they are 100% wrong! Everyone is allowed to vent and share what they're feeling. Nobody should be made to feel like they can't open up and talk to people....what people don't understand is the people they're saying that to.....most of the time already have a really hard time opening up and saying anything at all, and then to be told that....unacceptable!
Profile: MusicGal
MusicGal on Nov 16, 2014
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If you want them to be right, then they are right. But if you feel that what you are talking about is an issue, then they are in the wrong. You obviously trusted them and confided in them and that shows strength and courage, so are you complaining, no. You are just trying to get help! :)
Profile: Pieta
Pieta on Nov 18, 2014
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Absolutely not! If whatever you needed to talk about was important to you, there must be a place and time for you to actually share your story. We all need to blurt out our thoughts, fears, stories etc from time to time and for me it is inappropriate to just try and get someone off my chest by telling them to stop complaining. Of course there's a difference between nagging and talking, but assuming you did the latter, they're not right.
Profile: Casandra
Casandra on Oct 6, 2014
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Why would you think that? You should do what you think it.s better for you and what makes you feel better :3
Profile: Yourhelpfulguy
Yourhelpfulguy on Nov 5, 2014
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No, if you feel the need to speak with someone, then you should do it. Do not bottle your feelings up.
Profile: Twokindears
Twokindears on Jun 12, 2015
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If you have an event in your life that is bothersome and you can't get it off of your mind then it is worthy of discussing with someone. You just have to find the right person who is willing to listen without being judge mental! Everyone has the right to express themselves no matter how trivial it may seem to the next person! Sometimes just having someone listen attentively and compassionately may help to resolve or alleviate the stress that comes with what is nothing you so I beg to differ appropriately when it comes to releasing pent up feelings
Profile: RebeccaH
RebeccaH on Nov 30, 2015
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Maybe stop talking to *them* about it. They clearly don't value or want to understand your feelings. If you've tried all you can to explain how you feel only to be rejected, then this person might not be the best one to talk to. You deserve to have someone to listen to you. No feeling is too small; if it matters to you, then it matters. Period. Hopefully you are able to find someone to talk to who cares about what you have to say, be it here on 7cups,or in your own life. Good luck my friend!
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Sep 10, 2014
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I'm not sure. Tell me what happened to you and then I'll be able to tell you if they are right not.
Profile: Koyaa
Koyaa on Oct 8, 2014
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No, they are absolutely not right. You have every right to talk about what happened to you! Clearly this person is too self-absorbed to care about what others are going through.
Profile: Samantha25
Samantha25 on Oct 9, 2014
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It is never productive to ignore someone's feelings. If you need to express yourself and someone is brushing you aside as 'complaining' you may need to reevaluate who you are speaking to. You should feel safe to share your concerns and receive feedback in any relationship.
Profile: NikkiNicole
NikkiNicole on Oct 13, 2014
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No they are not right. If you are in the need to talk to someone let them know that you want to be heard and not let down. Those that tell u just might not be able to help.
Profile: listener11
listener11 on Oct 14, 2014
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No! Not everyone is able to listen without judging. Some people feel that when others talk about their negative things in their life they are complaining. However, you are just trying to find someone who is able to listen to you.
Profile: RYBH
RYBH on Oct 26, 2014
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They are wrong. I recommend going to a more trusted individual and telling them what happened to you. Find someone who will value what you have to say, such as a parent or trusted adult.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on May 29, 2015
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No they are not right,you tried to seek help for something that happened to you. You weren't complaining.
Profile: DipityEnigma
DipityEnigma on Jun 5, 2015
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No. If it matters to you that much, you shouldn't take what they said to heart. Often, those we try to talk to that react like this haven't been through the situations we have. If you're concerned about what happened to you, you could go see your GP and/or a counsellor.
Profile: iwillbeyourfriend
iwillbeyourfriend on Jul 31, 2015
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They are wrong! Dont believe in them. Talking about your traumatic experience actually will help you improve. You need to talk about it in details to experience healing. Keeping it inside will hurt you more.
Profile: ItWillBeOkaySarah
ItWillBeOkaySarah on Aug 3, 2015
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No, and I can tell you from experience. Sometimes it takes a lot of effort to just ask the person if they have a minute. I would have trust in this person and it is not right for them to blow you off.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Aug 25, 2015
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No, if it bugs you, you should try to get it off your chest and talk to someone. Maybe a counselor or someone you trust.
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