Perfect therapy for people who need help. I would like to say, I never can imagine it could be possible to heal people like that
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Tania
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Claudette Pretorius, MA Counselling Psychology
Licensed Professional Counselor
I know how overwhelming it can feel when you're having a tough time. I offer clients a space that is non-judgemental and empathetic whilst navigating these times together.
Top Rated Answers
Accepting that a relationship is over is incredibly difficult. It means that we have to accept that there were a lot of good memories made - and that there may not be the same kind of memories made anymore.
There's also the fear of accepting that we've been rejected by someone very close to us that we love. Feelings of "I'm not good enough" or "I could have done something differently" often plagued me after relationships ended.
Because right now at this very moment you don't want it to be over. You're digging your heals deep into the sand but somehow things keep slipping through your toes. As time goes on you'll slowly start walking through the sand again but right now you can't. Emotions are very powerful and its scary feeling out of control, your brain is telling you to move on accept it but you're heart will say otherwise. Don't give in you'll get there :)
You can't accept that it's over because you hold on to the happy moments that you got through and you don't want to have to face the reality that you're in.
I can accept that it's over in ways, but deep down I'll always have a small pain in my heart knowing that I could have done better. That even when it's over, I'm not ready to let go. And that my friend is the worst part of an ending. The emptiness of nevermore.
It sounds like you are looking for closure. Closure can manifest in many different ways, and some forms are more or less effective for different people. Maybe it's one final conversation with your ex where you both put it all out the table. Maybe it's seeing your ex in a new relationship. Maybe it's blocking their phone number & social media accounts. Maybe it's writing a letter to them where you get out all of your emotions & then burning it. Whatever you decide to do, just keep telling yourself that you're going to get through this rough patch & be alright.
You may be still in the belief that it is not (over). This is where you're stuck, between a reality and false perception. Like all things, however, you will come to realise that it is over and then you will find acceptance.
Letting go of the past isn't something that's easy to do. We put a lot of energy into building relationships and having to come to terms with fact that they didn't work out is a tough pill to swallow.
That depends on the situation but I would say maybe because it was either too good or too bad and traumatic. If it was too good, we can't just accept the fact that good things need to end at some point. If it was too bad, it's also hard to accept that it won't happen again and that is over.
Because you don't want it to be. This saying can be applied to multiple situations, including things like work: "Ex's are ex's for a reason". Think about why it ended and remember that. There may have been good times but there's always a reason as to why some things end.
Anonymous
September 1st, 2020 7:19am
You're forcing yourself that its not yet over. You're still believing that there is still a way to fixed it and go back from it. You don't want to accept it.
In this world of challenge, acceptance is the key for you to have peaceful mind. Accept what happened and take it as a lesson . So, you can apply that lesson next time.
Believe in yourself that you can get over with it. Be brave enough to face the problem.
To someone out there, i know that soon you will accept it and get over with it. It is hard at first but when time pass, you will bravely over with it.
Acceptance is the way for you.
It's hard to move on with your life no one likes change particularly with big events in their life
it can take time to find yourself in life to grow and develop in the world
Focus on what things you want out of life and take little steps to build on them
If it's over our eyes were put in the front of our head to keep moving forward - look to the future of things you want
Anonymous
March 21st, 2016 6:03pm
It is because our minds are set to get stuck in one situation even if it is over but overtime we learn how to accept that it's not occurring anymore.
Anonymous
May 2nd, 2017 11:26pm
I can't even accept that my past relationship is over. It's a hard thing to do if you actually had real feelings for the significant other and sometimes its just hard to accept but even if you can't accept it, don't let it get to the best of you. Be the best you can and once you find another at some point your past may fade just a little bit more
Anonymous
June 22nd, 2020 2:33am
Probably because you had something real and now it’s gone. Don’t worry thought because you will find someone else better. Trust me. It’s okay to be sad, I would be too but it will get better. And you might be hanging onto memories of them because they make or made you happy. You probably know deep inside that it’s actually over but it’s okay. Time will eventually heal the wound and everything will be fine. Or maybe they remind you of someone. If it’s that just try to let the memories go even if it pains you to do so.
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