my psychologist told me that my suicidal thoughts are normal and everybody has it. now i feel like i was only making things up and i lost my faith in therapy, what should i do?
4 Answers
Last Updated: 08/25/2020 at 7:41pm
Moderated by
Stacey Kiger, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
My belief is that therapy is not about giving advice, but joining you on your journey
Top Rated Answers
I think your psychologist doesn't deserve to be a psychologist. I don't care if that person is plain dumb or just worded it badly, but what that person said is not true. Suicidal thoughts are not normal. Yes, others may get suicidal thoughts, but they are not normal.
Suicidal thoughts usually occur when three of important factors of life are missing. The first is emotional connections. Suicidal people often feel alone, whilst human nature demands us to feel loved and cared for. The second is physical connections. Humans need to be held, touched, hugged etc. because it is also part of human nature. The last thing is a purpose. Everyone needs a reason to get out of bed in the morning, and without a purpose, life can be seen as pointless and not worth living for. If we magically had these 3 things right now, the chance of us still being suicidal is quite small. That's why I believe having suicidal thoughts is not normal, not because you are the only one going through it (I go through it too), but because it is the effect of missing important things that are 'normal' in life.
Please don't lose faith in therapy though, there are professional psychologists out there and if you find the right therapist for you, you may be able to feel better.
I think it was rather unprofessional of your psychologist to say something like that or maybe they worded it poorly . Maybe they were just trying to make your feel heard and validating your feelings not trivialising it. You should never think that your feelings are not valid and that you're making things up. It's okay to be not okay. And you can work it all out. I would suggest discussing it again with your therapist or looking for a new one if possible. Simultaneously you can also see a psychiatrist and look for that approach too. Meds can help some people with suicidal thoughts.
Anonymous
August 10th, 2020 6:41pm
Therapists are like pants. Just because one pair didn't fit doesn't mean that another won't also. You should look for another therapist that works well with you. Sometimes we find the right therapist at the right time but other times we have to keep looking. Take some out to research and look into your therapist. Sometimes we like to think of them as emotional heroes but they're honestly just humans who are good at listening. So sometimes they won't be great with us but you never if another will be. So get out there and find the right pair of "pants"! I believe in you.
Anonymous
August 25th, 2020 7:41pm
Unfortunately it often takes a while to find a therapist that is right for you. I understand the struggle, I went through about 6 therapists until I found one that I was able to bond with and who understood me and my needs. It can be very painful and disappointing when searching and often results in a loss of faith in therapy, but if you keep searching and trying I guarantee you will stumble upon someone who is able to support you in the way that you need. Many therapists also have different approaches to therapy and certain ones may not be a good fit for you.
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