Why can't my family just support me in my time of need?
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Last Updated: 05/04/2021 at 12:58am
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Sometimes parents, siblings or other family members cant support you because, in all honestly, they don't fully understand what it is that you're going through, and explaing it to them doesn't always do much good. Be it, anxiety, depression, an eating disorder or something else, they don't understand how you feel. But that's okay, not everybody does. But that's what the listeners here are for, as well as the people in the support groups, and on the forums. Even if your family can't support you, you are not alone. Stay strong :)
Sometimes family members don't know how to support other family members because they don''t understand what you are going through. Try explaining to them that you need support and help them understand what you are going through.
Although we are placed within a fa ily unit, there is a reason to learn/grow from/with each other. Sometimes the family may be so engrossed in own life, they forget about others, so may miss signs of how others are doing. They may just not be on same wavelength/clash personalities. There may be a generation gap, they may love you but be unable to talk to you and tell/show their love. They may become angry/frustrated with you as they feel you are deliberately not listening/going against them.
This can depend a lot on your family dynamics.
If you were loved and taken care of as a child, it might be that your parents are seeing your time of need, problem and sadness as their personal failure. They might think that they have not provided or cared enough for you and they subconsciously avoid the problem by not facing it. They are in a denial, because they take your problem as a proof of them not being good parents.
If, on the other hand, you always felt not loved and rejected by your parents/family, it might be that they have deeper issues or traumas themselves. While it is true that the parents' love is always present, certain people are better in parenting than others due to their life experiences and more stable relationship dynamics throughout their lives.
Another problem can be that they cannot really relate or understand what is that you are going through. Talking might help, but you need to carefully choose your words such that they are clear and precise. Sometimes, you might even have the same conversation more times, but if you feel like you are making even a slight progress - stick to it.
No matter what, please always remember that your family always wants the best for you and they love you no matter what. When things get rough - you can always come to us though. I hope this answers some part of your question,
Anonymous
August 18th, 2015 6:49am
Sometimes family doesn't understand that you need the support and they may not understand that you are in need. Try and express that you are in need of them and their support more. If they don't support you, you can always come talk at 7 Cups because we're always here to support you.
You need to know that your familly loves you and they don't support you sometimes because they think it's the best for you
Anonymous
May 7th, 2019 6:21pm
Your family may not understand what you're going through. Trying to help them understand might be a good way for them to support you in what ever is going on for you.
Your family may not understand what you're going through. Trying to help them understand might be a good way for them to support you in what ever is going on for you.
Your family may not understand what you're going through. Trying to help them understand might be a good way for them to support you in what ever is going on for you.
Your family may not understand what you're going through. Trying to help them understand might be a good way for them to support you in what ever is going on for you.
They might be struggling with their own issues. It is hard to support others when you are suffering. Try to give them patience and understanding. Maybe they need your help as much as you need theirs.
Well, your family might not have understood that you are in need of their help, or maybe they are also going through some hard situation
Anonymous
April 5th, 2016 1:06am
Perhaps they do not know what you are going through, perhaps it is they simply don't know how to help
in my time of need i know that my parents got many things in mind already so i do not ask for their support and try to solve my problem alone
What may be preventing them from giving you the support you need? Maybe they're busy, maybe they are not in the right state of mind to help others, maybe they don't know what you need, etc. Are you able to find support elsewhere in the mean time while you figure this out? Come take a chat with an experienced listener if you'd like to discuss this issue with someone :)
Family's can be difficult, and they may not understand how serious your issues are .it may be a good idea to talk to them . What do you think?
Often more than not, the people closest to us may fail to exceed our expectations of them. But, we tend to forget that even family are their own individuals and so perhaps there may be a miscommunication in the needs you may have at a certain time. I feel that transparency even with family members that you would expect to 'sense' your needs, should be openly expressed. Sometimes simply asking for assistance and support, while challenging it may be, can be the most fruitful action for yourself.
Families can be tough critics as they may not see certain situations from your point of view. If you have asked for support and have been rejected, perhaps placing yourself into the hands of a friend or someone you can trust to help you through your time can be beneficial. Regardless of what your family does, you deserve the support and respect you need and do not have to go through things alone! Perhaps once you are a bit more secure with your situation, you can try to explain to your family what you needed and why you needed it again.
Anonymous
May 4th, 2021 12:58am
There could be a lot of reasons why your family is not supporting you. Just like there’s something on other side of curtain, we never know to whole situation. What parents are thinking, what are their concerns. Everyone’s preceptive is different they are thinking with a very broad image. Yeah they can be working too. No doubt. But you can also put your point in front of them and talk about your concerns. Pros and cons show them these to ur parents. I’m sure they’ll support you, they just need a clear image about your steps. Maybe you can show them those.
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