I hate my family and want to move out right when I turn 18... is that okay?

189 Answers Moderated by Stacey Kiger, LPC Updated: Jul 12, 2021

Top Answers

Share Tweet

Anonymous on Nov 15, 2014

At the age of 18 you are a legal adult and are capable of making decisions that you feel is right for you. If you feel like you need to move away when you turn 18 than the choice is totally there for you.

Struggling with Family Stress?

Find relief with 7 Cups online therapy.

Learn more

Gilles on Oct 22, 2014

I think that what you feel about your family has not to be questioned, what you feel is what you feel and that is absolutely all right. It is only a guess but I suppose that if you hate your family and consider moving out as soon as possible it means that you don't want or just can't share with your family in any way about what makes you feel so bad. Therefore, if you feel the need to move out as soon as you turn 18 and if you can afford it (money, supportive friends, etc.), I really think that you have the right to be glad to do so, no regret, no shame, no guilt.

MirandaD on Nov 12, 2014

Of course that's okay. First though, make sure you have some form of safety-net (like a close friend/family member willing to take you in if rent falls out). Also be sure of why you're doing this. Is your family abusive? Make sure you talk to a therapist or counsellor about your family issues and see if you can get help.

AlexieOak on Jun 30, 2015

Absolutely! Not everybody gets along with their families(I know I don't) and it's nothing to be ashamed about! Any relationship you have should be based in a mutual love and respect for one another and if your relationship with your family is a bad one, there is no need to push for things that aren't there, you know?

Anonymous on Oct 30, 2014

It's okay to feel hostility towards your family, I definitely did when I lived at home. The best thing to do is to focus on making yourself happy and building towards a positive future where you can support yourself when you do move out

magneticPomegranate96 on Dec 26, 2015

That is totally understandable! My parents also put me through hell and i would move out. But imagine if you were gone, think about how they would feel. If you think they wouldn't care then pursue it. However, if you have the slightest doubt then rethink everything.

mazin49 on Oct 28, 2014

running from and not facing your problems and feeling is never the answer , the act of running is like when your room is in chaos , you don't get it organized !!!  you go find a new house to live in !!

Pandette on Nov 16, 2014

Speaking as someone who does not know about what you have gone through and your family, I feel like this question should be directed towards yourself. What made you hate your family? Why is it that you want to move out? Is there anything you can do to change these reasons? Self-reflecting is a great way to see what you want. I think it is completely okay to move out, but just make sure you know what you are going to be getting yourself in to, first. 

SweetPorcelain on May 8, 2015

yes. if you can take care of your basic needs (food, clothes, housing) then do what makes you happy.

BlackInk96 on Dec 27, 2015

It's perfectly ok if you don't like you family. Not all families are great, not all parents are good at parenting. Moving out and find your place in the world is your right

RinRin on Oct 23, 2014

I used to be like that too. My family and I don't get along as much. I told myself that I would move out when I turn 18. But before I turned 18, I learned that my family will be here for me no matter what, and that we can't survive without them, especially if we're still young.

Harri on Oct 27, 2014

As long as you feel comfortable moving out when you're 18 and you're sure it's whats best, there is nothing wrong with that. But moving out can be a massive step even when you don't get on with your family, so you shouldn't be afraid to really explore the details of it

Sadiewillow1 on Oct 12, 2014

I think it's okay to want to move out when you turn 18, but I also think it's important to try to find a way to be happy with your situation and to not just be waiting until the moment you turn 18. 

Anonymous on Oct 30, 2014

Is it absolutely fine to want your own space and to be away, and at 18 you have every right to do so. But keeping in contact with your family at least partially is also important, unless they cause you too much pain.

Anonymous on Dec 13, 2015

I think that's okay. Your emotional, physical, and spiritual health is the most important and if you feel your family isn't contributing to that then get away. Just make sure that wherever you end up won't be just as detrimental to your health! A lot of time people believe that just because you're family you should automatically feel a certain way towards them and feel some sort of loyalty but that's not necessary. It's okay to feel the way you feel because your feelings are valid. I do believe that when you're ready you should have a conversation with them about it! 

Anonymous on Nov 10, 2014

It is fine to move out when you turn 18. But in the long run your future emotional well being will greatly benefit greatly if you can part ways with your family under amicable circumstances.  

lightPetrichor34 on Nov 11, 2014

You're the only one who can know that for sure, but if you do think it's the best thing for you to do, there are plenty of resources to help young people who are on their own. I have a few friends who did, but they were all very extreme situations. If you're unsure, it is ok to seek help, and any professional will keep your interactions private. If you're in school and trust your counselor, you could talk to them, or any third-party adult who might know the situation better or help you find more professional help if you feel it would help.

xXNNYXx on Oct 30, 2014

That is perfectly acceptable if you feel its what you must do, I left when I turned 18 traveled the united states and was made better for it, but if you do leave just make sure you have a safe place for you to stay and have a plan A, B , and C.

Anonymous on Nov 20, 2014

As long as you are earning your own income and are able to look after yourself it should be fine, afterall you are technically an adult now.

amazingRainfall28 on Dec 23, 2015

Yeah I think that is okay, only you truly know what living with your family is like.  It's important not to make any hasty decisions though, plan with your best interests in mind. You never know, you might get on better with them when there is more distance between you, depending on the circumstances. 