I can't get over my ex after 5 years. What should I do?

I had a similar situation - I couldn't get over my ex for a long time, no matter what my friends told me. When we were dating, he was so sweet and caring, my friends liked him and everything. All of a sudden, he left me and I was devastated. Since we were in high school (seniors) at this time, I had to see him everyday for the rest of the year, having fun with other girls. One thing he asked from me after our break-up was that we stay friends and I agreed - to an extent. We were friends, yes, but I ignored him for quite a few months. I moved away from the room if he was there, I ignored his messages, I didn't even look at him for more than 2 seconds. But slowly, I started talking to him again and we became close friends again...but I still wasn't over him. Then, I made myself do something drastic, that would change my life. I shifted to another country. High school was over, and I wanted to stay in my home country for university but I thought that won't actually help me, so I moved. Long story short, after 3 years since we dated, I am over him. What I'm trying to say is, don't let him hold you back. Your memories may have been sweet, and you love thinking about them, but remember, as much as it hurts, it is not what it was like before. Sometimes, you have to take risks. Delete him from your life for a while, and move on. Slowly but surely, you'll get there. Go out with friends, take risks and meet new people. Whatever you do, do not let your ex hold you back. I know this will hurt, and I'm sorry to say, your ex may not be thinking of you in the same way you are thinking about him/her now. Even if things somehow managed to patch up and you guys got back together, trust me...it won't be the same. Remember, all types of friendships, relationships come and go. Don't stay in one place for too long. :)

It's difficult to get over our exes, especially those that we truly cared about and had meaningful relationships with. The recovery is slow going, but it -is- possible. There will be a lot of sleepless nights, crying, shouting, and blaming--it's okay to react this way at first, pain is natural. But, through time and self-reflection, you can come to accept your new situation.

Time and distance are the two most important ingredients in recovery, but neither does any good at all if you keep rehashing issues that are over and done with. Even if you only ever revisit your relationship inside your own head, if you're always thinking about it, you won't get over it easily. There isn't much else to getting over a relationship. There's no perfect resolution that will give you any kind of catharsis if you can't tell yourself simply "This is over, and that is okay. We are over, but I am not over." A relationship doesn't fail because they weren't good enough or because you weren't good enough, but rather because of some fundamental misunderstanding or disconnect: you simply weren't meant to be. Take the lessons and mistakes you learned, and grow and be happy, and the relationships you want will form around you. When you love yourself and accept yourself, the world will do the same. But you have to mean it. You can't just say it. You have to believe it. You are wonderful and okay and amazing, and when you realize that, you'll realize you never really needed anyone else at all. It is good to want, it is good to love, but you never really need anyone. You are you , and you don't need anyone else to make you whole. Perhaps more importantly, no one else even can make you whole.

Maybe you should try to contact him now and ask him to meet up with you. Maybe you get on well again and maybe he isn't over you yet... It's never to late

Evaluate the situation! Dig deep why it's been 5 years and getting over your ex is still a dilemma. Lastly, try to find out if the status is doing you good or not.

I dated a guy for 8 years and I got engaged to him, I couldn't get over him even though I knew he's not good for me. For almost two years I kept going back to him whenever he asked and repeating the same old mistakes until this one night where I sat down and cried for hours and hours trying to understand what the problem was exactly. Then I took a pen and a paper and wrote down everything that's wrong with him, with the relationship and with me. I still miss him and I often think about him but I never think about going back to him cause that paper, that list reminds me of everything that's not right with that decision. Sometimes we make repeated mistakes because we forget WHY is something and someone bad for us. So yea, hope it helps. Stay strong!

You need to be gentle with yourself. Maybe what you're "not over" isn't your ex at all, but struggles, disappointments and regrets that you haven't come to terms with (yet).

Realize there are 2 people here. One is your projected partner. The other is the real person there. Took me a while to realize this, and detach my needed partner from that person, and the problem stopped. I requested my needed partner from wrong people. Once you realize this, problem stops. And you cannot be fooled easily anymore (usually by your own mind, then by others, who profit from your delusionment)

Remember that your ex is your ex for a reason. Know that you have given your best shot and now you have to learn from the past and move to the future.

There are some people that remain in your life forever due to the impact that they had on it. You might not - and probably won't - ever forget about him. You might still cherish the moments you lived with him, even if you wouldn't ever want to get back together with him. You might think about him every now and then. The important thing is not that you forget him and never think about him again, it's that you learn that you can move on with your life and love somebody else just as much if not more than you loved him. Or maybe just in a different way. If your relationship ended because you felt like he wasn't the right man for you, remember that. It's easy over the years to remember all the bad stuff, all the reasons we didn't want to be with that person. But remember, there is a reason why you aren't together anymore. And in 5 years, people change, so chances are he wouldn't be the man that you first fell in love with. Allow yourself to love someone who will always be the man who deserves you.