Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How do I let go of pent up anger towards an ex?

Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Apr 27, 2018
...read more
Go punch him in the face, or slap him. Or you can just make him feel bad, or you just be evil and ruin his life !!
Struggling with Breakups?
Find relief with 7 Cups online therapy.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Jul 6, 2015
...read more
Anger is the flip side of Love, a totally natural and very primal emotion that when addressed properly, can be healthy and cathartic to exercise out. The snag comes when we hold onto that anger for too long, or if we're angry at someone or something, no longer a part of our life. If anger has nowhere to go, and no healthy outlet to be released into, it can turn inwards and cause all kinds of trouble in our lives. As easy as it is to be told just to "let it go." the process itself can be very complicated and confusing. The most important aspect of anger is the resolution of it. Being able to forgive those who have angered us is just as much about giving ourselves peace as it is offering an olive branch. Like all emotions, developing coping tools for your emotional tool box is always a crucial aspect to effectively dealing with strong feelings. It should be noted that forgiveness certainly doesn't require forgetting, and if a person has hurt you, is toxic to you, or isn't an appropriate fit for your life, forgiving them doesn't mean you have to let them back in. Your wellbeing and mental health is always priority number 1! Some of the most effective ways to manage anger towards an individual no longer in the picture is to physically let them go, to do this I suggest a simple exercise with a very large impact. Write them a note with all of the reasons why you're angry, everything they did to hurt you, all of the feelings you feel and get it all out on paper. The idea isn't for them to ever read it, but for you to get all of your anger out and onto something physical, and when you feel ready, find a creative way to let go of both the letter, and your anger. You may want to tie it to some balloons and watch it float up and out of your life forever, have a bonfire and send that anger off viking style, or maybe you decide to make confetti and throw yourself a "letting go" party. Whichever you choose to do, keep in mind that as people with such wonderfully complicated lives, anger is a natural part of our interactions with other people. Striving for that anger to be healthy should be our goal, and taking time to get it all out and let it go in appropriate ways, can be just the thing needed to help get you back to your happy place. At the end of every dark night, there is the brightness of day. Be kind to yourself. Adam Castle BSW MSW CAC.
Profile: valdenan
valdenan on Jan 30, 2017
...read more
Realize that your ex is a person on their own journey, just like you are. We are all trying our best to be happy and your ex is no exception. Now is the time to focus on what matters: you. You tried your best with your ex and you may feel angry, but now is the time to let go and focus on healing yourself. By letting go of your anger you move one step towards healing yourself and that's what is important right now.
Profile: disenchanted99
disenchanted99 on Jan 29, 2017
...read more
Instead of letting it go, use the anger for motivation. Your ex probably wants you to be unhappy. To spite them, become happy. Channel your anger into ambition and motivation to be the best you can be. Show your ex that you've moved on and become stronger, more confident, and happier.
Profile: Tesora
Tesora on Oct 28, 2017
...read more
Letting go of anger at an ex- or anyone for that matter- can truly be a lifetime process. I think the first step to truly letting it go is to be gentle on yourself, to acknowledge that it's okay if you forgive a little, then get angry again. Anger is a powerful emotion- and it has a lot to tell us. Can you sit with your anger? Can you be angry and not add guilt or shame on top of it? Sometimes (not always) anger is an emotion that tells us we missed our chance to say "no." Should you have said "no" at some crossroad? Knowing that your angry is from crossed boundaries can be helpful- it can teach you a boundary to think more about in the future. What else can that anger tell you about yourself and your life? Does it tell you that you need to slow down and breathe? Does it tell you a little bit about your own core values? Your emotions are just trying to get your attention- trying to help you learn and grow and move toward a balanced state of happiness. Letting go of unpleasant emotions is the work of a lifetime, and starts with gentle noticing.
Profile: boatride
boatride on May 2, 2015
...read more
accept the fact that the person is your 'ex'. A failed character of your own story.cover it with pity.
Profile: Anonymous
Anonymous on Mar 7, 2015
...read more
Breathe in. Breathe out. You have to just let this person go, no matter how much they hurt you. This is how you let go of pent up anger towards your ex. : )
Profile: caringHorizon84
caringHorizon84 on Jun 23, 2015
...read more
They lost you its their fault not yours . you are too special for them to handle . Life goes on always
Profile: ChainsGoneSetFree
ChainsGoneSetFree on Jun 13, 2016
...read more
Anger is the need to release our feelings and sometimes we need to talk it out with someone who's not emotionally connected. Go on, I'm listening.
Profile: Greatlistener87
Greatlistener87 on May 9, 2016
...read more
The idea is just to let go. What is done is done & always remember that there is Karma So let it be and move on.
Have a helpful insight? Don’t keep it to yourself.
Sharing helps others and its therapeutic for you.
0/150 Minimum Characters
0/75 Minimum Words