I don't feel emotions and feel as though I'm a zombie most of my day. I dropped out of college for a failed relationship, failed military now use drugs on a daily basis just to feel.. what do I do?

Well life may seem like a dead end but believe me when I say that there is light at the end of the tunnel, it may feel different but you’re near. There are always second chances, no ones a failure. We might feel like that but it’s not true. Emotions will come once you feel happy, I know how hard it is to feel happy but you will. And honestly trying is all that matters try to go back to college if you want, try to have a new relationship that is worth it and try to leave drugs if you want. It’s never too late to learn to fly. We humans sometimes stop ourselves from flying just because we fell a few times. Fear does help a little but it shouldn’t hold you back from spreading your wings and exploring the horizon.

Grieving over a failed relationship is extremely hard. You have to realize that drugs or alcohol do not provide you the happiness you need. Instead of turning to substances, turn to trusted friends to get you through it. Slowly start distracting yourself with the right things (go outside for a walk, learn something new, or grab lunch with a friend). I know that drug addictions are really hard to deal with, so it'll take time to completely break free from them but anything is possible. You just need to surround yourself with the right people and the right activities to get yourself through it.

This is a deep question and one that would require a very professional opinion. Please bare in mind I am not that professional opinion. A lack of feeling can come from a variety of things, sleep being one of the main offenders, excessive drug use, excessive use of stimulants such as coffee. Or it can come from various mental health diagnosis, so this is almost impossible to address online with out far more information I am afraid. In regards to the rest of your question. I would take a holistic approach to your situation. Diet, sleep hygiene, past experience, home life, hobbies, alcohol consumption, etc. All of these can have a direct impact on your level of motivation in things like keeping up with a relationship or studying for collage. Take a step back, look at all of the things that you do in your day to day. It can be things as simple as not getting enough sunlight in your day. Overall I would strongly advise speaking to a counsellor and asking for a holistic counselling approach to identify why you have a lack of motivation. I really hope this helps