I am scared and lonely.
I am scared of being alone for my whole life. I am a single 35 year old woman who has never really been in a relationship. No one has ever shown interest in me and I have no idea why. I am smart, articulate, funny, and albeit overweight but I have found that isn't a deterrent for people. I am successful and work very hard. I have anxiety about life passing me by. I have a fear of never experiencing a family of my own. I suspect most people do not really like me and I am an annoyance but I never had friendships as a child either. I was isolated from friendship since the age of 5 until 12. I often feel I get on other's nerves and my opinion or voice is not wanted. I do not know how to combat this. I tried face to face counseling and even with that I felt like I was annoying to the therapist. I am insecure in my own self worth and I have no idea how to get through it.
@PersistenceResistence
This was very similar to my situation 7 years ago. I was worried that I would never get married. I prayed so much every day and kept faith and trusted that God knows what he's doing. He does things in His time for whatever reasons we don't need to question. My mama told me to have patience. It was hard for me to be patient as time passes faster and faster as we age. I am now married. I fear I may not be able to have children but I have learned to put my life in God's hands. When I look back on my life everything leading up to the moment I met my husband fell perfectly and amazingly into place. I wish I could really explain it.
Please don't feel like you are bothering people, especially people who are being paid to help you. I don't know you but I care about you. Sometimes I still feel like I'm saying the wrong thing or making someone angry. It hurts and I feel very lonely. I don't want anyone to feel the way I feel. I care about you and I want to help you. Let me know if there is anything I can do for you. How can we be in contact?
@PersistenceResistence
Being single is one of many possibilities. I am a 33 year old woman and I have friends who are single, friends who are in a lesibian relationship (cannot have baby), friends who's married and now divorced, and myself who's recently married but worried about having children as well because of my emotional instability, my age and our financial situation.
I had friends growing up but I moved so many times with family then my friends I made in university moved everywhere else so now I have no friends. I also frequently get annoyed or triggered by people who used to be my friends/family who then I would start avoiding so now I feel totally utterly isolated.
I do think all of us have something we should work on to improve ourselves but loneliness/lack friends is a symptom of our time that traps many like you and me.
Thank you for sharing.
@PersistenceResistence
Oh, how your post speaks directly to my heart. I'm a 24 year old woman, and I hear and I feel what you are experiencing. Feeling unwanted, like a burden, and not good enough. Ugh. Yes. It's like wearing a really ugly cloak all day, every day, that you can't take off no matter how badly you want to. Sending you love. Xoxo. Marie