Aknowledging sexual abuse, where do I go from here?
I am currently in the process of aknowledgingsomething that happened 4 years ago (when I was 14) as the sexual abuse that it was. I'm not really sure what to do now, or how to handle it.
I have trouble with obsessive thoughts and one problem is thoughts about this that keep coming up, but I also can't just repress all thoughts of it, as that's what I've been doing for years and it really hasn't helped. I need to deal with the relevent things, while not fixating on the rest, and I have no fucking idea how to do that
I also don't know what to do with relationships. I'm not in one at the moment, and I don't know that I will be for some time, but I haven't had a functioning one since that happened, and I don't want it to hold me back (which is has done)
Do I tell people about it? My friends? Potential partners? Anyone? Do I just bring it up if it's ever relevent, or is it better for my mental health to aknowledgeit more openly?
I'm struggling, and some advice on any of this or just some support would be really apprechiated
Hi! Coming to terms with any type of abuse is an incredibly difficult task, but the simple fact that you want to start the process of acknowledging and accepting it is a great first step. Obsessive thoughts are rooted in anxiety, and anxiety is released through coping mechanisms, so that's a good place to start to help alleviate some of the recurring negativity you might have. A good way to do this is to journal, write down everything you are feeling and why until you don't have any words left. If you don't want to keep this, you can burn it as an act of "releasing" the negativity if you'd like!
What happened to you is your experienceto disclose. Some people are able to reach a point where they can tell others about their experience(s), others may never be able to do so, and both are fine. You have to go at your own pace and set your own boundaries. Some people find comfort in letting their friends and partners know about it, especially when things become very intimate in a relationship setting, others not so much.
This link brings up different ways to cope and handle trauma, including both self-care and therapeutic approaches if you're interested.
http://www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/emotional-and-psychological-trauma.htm