This Place Is Not Welcoming So Far
I haven't been here very long yet, and it's already been a terrible time. Most of my life has been packed full of abusive experiences. I haven't been able to talk to anyone about these experiences that understands or who won't gaslight me or try to use these experiences against me. I've been hunting for a place to vent for YEARS. Lots and lots and lots and lots of apps and sites later, I end up here, and in the trauma group chat, I was trying to vent, and someone there made it seem as though that's not what you do on this site. They kept insisting I was just being a nuisance and negative for wanting to vent, and they said I should offer something first if I expect something in return. I just need to vent...
And it's confusing because I see people venting in the chats all the time here. Am I missing something?
And Noni....the AI "counselor." I made the mistake of going into some REALLY personal and traumatizing things that happened to me the first time I talked to Noni. That was DAYS ago. Today, I wanted to talk to Noni about something COMPLETELY different, and they just randomly brought up the traumatizing thing I was trying to talk to them about before. It REALLY did not help.
Is it REALLY worth it to stay here? I'm already on the edge, absolutely ready to give up on anything. I'm not trying to find anything that will push me over, like the experiences I've had here. Please, is it worth it to stay here or not?
And please don't tell me it depends on the time of day I come on here...
@thelindzchronicles I mean I been on here since 2014 but life got in the way it depends on what your needs are I guess people come in go on here
@thelindzchronicles
Hello Lindz,
Yes, I do think that 7cups is worth it. Many people on here have dealt or been dealing with trauma or other forms of distress.
Venting is normally always welcomed. In all groups, beware only that the Sharing circle can often be rigid on not interrupting mid share, that allows focus on one sharer at a time as it can be a much appreciated venting fashion by some at some given moments. I am sorry that someone has (A-) been so insensitive to you on the trauma group chat (B-) brought confusion about one of the main purposes of all 7cups group chats where 7cups is a solution for people to not be alone in dealing with their problems and to feel&be safe to vent.
Nethertheless, I think you must know that sometimes there will be people less sensitive than others ; less considerate than others ; more intense than others ; more negative or pessimistic than others ; more argumentative than others. Some may also be hypersensitive, and hypersensitivity may go one way or the other. You might occasionally encounter trolls too, I've seen two so far on the group chats (or were they the same one on two different days, I wouldn't know and I didn't care really) who were very obvious. I find that not taking things personally is best, as none is really ever personal (it's just people dealing with issues of their own and in a kind of way that might disagree with some). You can always easily contact a moderator who'll take swift action, by looking for them among the active members list of your group chat or any other group chat (as one group chat sometimes has no moderator in it but others do, at a same given time).
In any way, aside from Noni, we're all humans with both feelings and thoughts and doing the best we know how to. Among us, you'll find a great deal of people who are caring, empathetic, compassionate, attentive and loving. Showing understanding, helping to boost others' morale, or simply listening (in silence or with more or less emphatic comments of support), and sharing our own tribulations and joys in hopes to receive what support 7cups may bring us.
Trauma is hugely challenging, I know first hand the rollercoaster it can be and how gloomy it can be at the lower points of the rollercoaster. I've overcome two PTSD at different times of my life. The most severe one being the second one (btw, that one was complex PTSD). At Present, and since about two weeks ago, there's ongoing trauma and associated stress responses happening in my life. I feel well equipped to promptly and efficiently deal with the present thanks to the teachings from my past experiences. I wish to tell you to never give up on yourself and to keep hoping for the better even if there are times when it sounds like a foreign idea. You may also try EMDR therapy*, (SAFELY, if and as acceptable depending on your physical condition meditating, doing yoga, doing low intensity strength training and cardio (I insist on low intensity, your body is stressed already at the moment lets avoid unnecessary additional excessive stress)), going into nature, spending time with safe animals, staying hydrated with mineralwater&tea, eating and sleeping at fixed hours as much as possible in order to give your body a sense of basic primary safety.
As you have, I have also endured quite a bit of abuse. Family and peer abuse, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, bullying, and gaslighting, for instance. If you need to talk to people who can relate to some degree and who care, I think you can find some here on 7cups. Okay, I'm very tired now and must absolutely catch some Zzzz. Take care of yourself, best wishes
Welcome & See you later,
Emilia
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*About therapy being traumatising, as you evoke that in your Bio, for me EMDR therapy was very healing. The therapist was very good for EMDR, but during therapy he's said a few things that were just wrong and unprofessional. All in all the benefits of EMDR therapy were higher than the bad occurrences during therapy and I'm very glad I did that therapy. But to each person their own experience and their own therapists, I believe you when you say therapy can be traumatising and I understand that the risks might outweigh the benefits depending on the therapists/therapy environment/therapy method.
Dm me, I'm always here to listen:)