Needing to vent a bit (TW auto accident, gun violence, and SA)

So last week I was rear ended by a semi while stopped at a red light. My car was totaled, but I was physically fine. Pretty shaken up and sore the following day, but otherwise fine.

However, I was heavily encouraged to go to the ER and get checked out, just in case. I knew this was the smart choice to make, so I went, but medical trauma is a good part of my PTSD. The last time I was in that ER, I was seeking a rape kit, and this visit brought it all back.

I also had an incident earlier this year where I was stopped at a red light and the car next to me shot at me with an airsoft rifle.

To top it all off, I lost my job a few weeks ago when my position was eliminated by the company. I’ve been applying to every job I’m even remotely qualified for, but haven’t had much luck yet. The current lack of a vehicle has cost me at least one job so far. I am able to get unemployment for now, but that barely covers the bills, and DoorDash was my backup plan to make extra money if I needed it.

My coping skills are good enough to handle any one of these things, or even a couple, but all of it together has made my ptsd symptoms worse than they’ve been in years. I‘m not sleeping much and am a little terrified to leave the house. I’ve also been dissociating quite a bit.

I know this will pass and I’ll feel better eventually, but right now I’m so tired and frustrated.