CPTSD affecting new relationship?
tw: online grooming
Hi!
I'm new to 7Cups. I'm currently unravelling some suppressed memories and trauma of being groomed online from the ages of 12-21. I never met him in person. I'm currently in a new relationship with an amazing guy, he's supportive and kind and I've shared with him what I'm going through. I couldn't ask for better.
I'm experiencing a lot of anxiety and I think I've worked out that though my boyfriend himself isn't a threat, my gut instinct some of the time thinks an intimate, romantic relationship is a threat. I really feel like he's great for me and he's being really amazing. Does anyone relate to how I'm feeling? I feel guilty for sometimes feeling anxious about something that's really good and I feel like no one will understand if I explain it to them- that people will assume that the relationship isn't a good one if I"m feeling anxious within it.
I'd love to hear from anyone that has experienced similar, or anyone that has built trust with someone after some sort of traumatic relationship.
Thanks for reading
@hannahrosec
Hi there. After trauma we develop hyperviligance and avoidance. It's expected. If the person is loving, he/she should understand and be gentle. Try to convey that to the person. Being vulnerable can lead to wonderful things in relationship. Good luck!
I went through a issue that has some similarities. A year after I got out of a bad relationship , I met to person of my dreams. Unfortunately, the trauma from my past and new wounds from my failed engagement, made my new and amazing relationship feel wrong. It lead to me being insecure and unable to feel confident in my relationship. I told her that I she was the person person but the timing couldn’t be worse.
im not saying this is what you should do and tbh if I could do it again I might selfishly do it differently and never let them go. I can’t tell you how it ended.
It broke my heart and theirs. they moved on and I started dealing with my demons. I think of them every day, and it’s been over a year. They don’t want anything to do with me anymore and I get why. It’s a tough thing to try to make the best decisions, but we try to consider everything and do what’s right for everyone.
