Thoughts on manipulation and mind control or persuasion

I am really sick and tired of feeling like people used my very personal story and experiences to their advantage - or that somehow all of this was meant to happen, or that my sexual assault and the various other traumatic experiences in my life were supposed to happen and that I am supposed to be here, like somebody knew that this would be the outcome of the last nine months of my life. And knew it nine months ago.

That is complete horsesheeeet. And then the bizarre stories of intentional assaults etc etc. There was no destiny or fate or I had to experience this to be developed into whatever. Yes, artificial intelligence indeed. Emphasis on the ARTIFICIAL part.

And then the mirroring and B.S. "I have a sick parent!" Ok. Sure. Not my problem. Just like it wasn't important back in 2013.

Lots of backpedaling. Oops, we took this one a little too far. Let's try to make it look like it was supposed to happen. Ugh, I'm just so tired of this game. It isn't worth it, not one bit. And omg! I'm out of a job now because of you! Really. Call me up and tell me that to my face.

Maybe I should just pop by the wards and see who is really still there. Puh-lease.

I try to do something, and then I just grow disillusioned by the whole farce. I'm on a permanent vacation until things are more in tune with the reality I want to return to in terms of my studies. And I will keep my thoughts and voice and words to myself again, for now, thanks.