Aurora's Diary Entries: Inviting you join me in recovery
Diary Entry 1 to myself, March 2nd, 2022:
This will be an open-diary notice to myself:
Validating my traumas:
My dad used to be an alcoholic from when I was 8 years old to 17 years of age. I am currently 18, where I am finally able to work on my recovery as my dad has almost died and needed to stop drinking. It has been 6 months but I have felt betrayed and hurt by those once close to me in the months of October and November. Really, it has only been 4 months. But things are progressively getting better with each and every day. Yes, I take a step back every now and then, it doesn't make me weak. I do this so that the trauma I have endured, my brain that has been significantly hurt, can build-up more resilience like my mind. Throughout these past few months, my grades have been troubling for me as doing school when your head is constantly throbbing is a no-go. I have discovered a herbal remedy, known as Ashwagandha. This medicine has been sitting in my medicine cabinet for a while, as I had originally bought it to battle my dad's addiction, where his physical symptoms of illness overwhemed any mental ones of my own.
Time-references that mark my worst moments and improvement:
With many thanks to this medicine, I have finally been able to stop the persisting 'head-banging' feeling and my stress levels are reducing, significantly. I have noticed other good changes within myself, where in the months of: September, October, Novemeber, December and January, I have had zero energy to get-out of bed and was struggling significantly, to where I am now in the months of: February and March. Within these past 2 months, I have been able to get a hold on myself so that I may embrace good changes in my life.
From February 1st, I have started creative-writing entires everyday. I got so passionate about writing that I had entered my first-ever writing contest: a short-story contest. I am really happy to say that my loved ones and my friends enjoyed my first-ever story! They have told me that my words are empowering and I am forever thankful for that. I have even decided to write a letter to my Prime Minister, Justin Trudeau, hoping to seek more changes in our mental health system that may benefit all. Finally, I am surprised to say I have build up the motivation to enter a scholarship, for where the organization wholly appreciates you and validates your struggles. That alone has been blessful to me. There is also the war that ranges in Ukraine, that has made many miserable and I can understand that it is a sad situation but I see it as a fight against dictatorship all around the world. Knowing that Zelenskyy is a Jew touches my heart because he is going up against a dictator, succesfully defending his homeland from this man who is treating his citizens alike Nazi Germany. I have never felt such great love towards myself as I have had when people are sharing how proud they are of Ukrainians, noting:
"You guys are strong and inspire the world."
What I have always wanted was to belong to a community so I am thankful I can see myself among other Ukrainians who wish for world peace alongside the rest of the world.
New monthly goals:
My new goals that I am pursing for the months of (March-April) is: guitar and piano playing, working-out, reading and making clothes from my old and now outgrown clothing.
@LovedHumanBeing
Wishing you the best of luck in your recovery and good luck on achieving your monthly goals!