New Here… PTSD/ Severe Anxiety with depression
I’ll try to keep this short… I’m in my later 30’s have children. Divorced twice. Recently married… I have been struggling a lot lately. I do suffer from PTSD and I have had trauma since the day I was born. I have been told that living a very long and excessive trauma filled life is definitely why I am the way I am… My first two husbands were abusive in every way and cheated on me in the most horribly disgusting ways possible. My childhood was def filled with trauma. I’m not really good at sharing I get nervous and scared about people knowing my weaknesses bc I fear that’s the only reason people ask is to use it against you.
With my new husband, I am currently in a state of not really thinking I’m being cheated on but definitely being “set off” like just noticing things that remind me of my past when I was cheated on. I feel like I’m not being heard at all at home and it makes me care less and less about myself or what I need to do in life. I do see a therapist weekly but I don’t feel like it’s working. We have been talking for 5/6 months now, weekly. And I’m just not feeling any better on any level
@SilverSkies24
hey there! It does seem like you have been handling a whole lot ever since you can remember, I can only imagine how heavy it must be to go through trauma in almost every close relationship you have been in
Be it your parents and the family you grew up in or your romantic relationships
I’m sorry to know that you are not feeling heard or supported in your current relationship and Home either
Handling all that and adding daily life and motherhood to it would drain anyone
I am glad you are here and reaching out for support, I know it is hard to share and talk about things, especially when every past experience has proved that people use your trust to hurt you rather than help you
But I am glad you are giving it another chance here on cups, And I would like you to remember that 7 Cups is completely anonymous and every chat is confidential
Even if someone tried to use what you share against you, they could not harm you in any meaningful way, You can always block anyone who tries to hurt you, and they would have no way of reaching you
Also, I can hear you about therapy not showing much improvement, sometimes it’s just that healing takes time and is not a linear process, and sometimes it might be that your therapist might not be the right one for you
Maybe you can talk about the fact that you don’t feel like therapy is working and why with the Therapist themselves and they can help you figure out, which is the reason
I would love to hear more from you about how life is going how you are coping and anything that is heavy on your heart right now
I probably cannot solve anything, but it can feel a bit lighter when you put thoughts and feelings into words and share them with someone
hope you have a lovely day ahead💜
