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I can’t detach myself from a friendship that ended months ago

User Profile: JemilioJ
JemilioJ October 29th, 2022

At first she told me she didn’t want to call me anymore, then she said she wanted space indefinitely, then we didn’t talk for months. She then said she wasn’t mad at me anymore but told our mutual friend she wouldn’t initiate conversations and just doesn’t feel anything towards me. Then I broke down and felt really, really bad and guilty, like this was all my fault. I told her I felt really sorry and that I was mad at myself and she cut me off right there, blocked me, and I‘ve only felt so much worse. I failed a relationship that was so special to me, and now I cry and break down every day, and I just don’t want to live like this, but don’t know what to do either.

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User Profile: fruityPond7887
fruityPond7887 October 31st, 2022

@JemilioJ Hi! I hope this message finds you well. I'm really sorry to hear about your friendship. Losing a friend is always so hard and I want you to know that you are allowed to grieve because you lost an important person in your life. Please take all the time you need to grieve because there's no time limit on grieving. Please don't hesitate to reach out to a Listener if you feel that speaking to someone would help too! You're never alone!💛

User Profile: Mossyboi
Mossyboi April 18th, 2023

Hello, I think I understand how you feel. I've been in a very similar situation and was heart broken for years. Here are some things I would like for you to remember:

1.) Not every relationship (friendship included) will last forever. It is simply a part of life. This does not reflect on your worth as a person. Everyone is deserving of love.

2.) You can not blame yourself forever. It is very well possible you did not do anything wrong. Not everyone gets along, this is okay.

3.) I know how much it can hurt to lose someone you felt so close to. But you need to remember, this pain will pass eventually. It will fade with time, you will heal, and you will find new people who care about you.. but only if you allow these things to happen.

4.) You can not hinge your self worth on others, you will always wind up hurt. This is easier said than done, it will be a long journey of acceptance, forgiveness, and self love. You should always be your own best friend. Be kind to yourself. Learn to show yourself the unconditional love and acceptance you need.


Good luck. Stay strong. I wish you the best.