Witnessing.
This is a hard subject for myself to come to turns with because it is so recent. This year I have witnessed my rolemodel physically, emotionally and financially abuse my Mother. Without going into too much details, how do you find hope and faith when all of that is lost? I thought my family would never be in a situation like this, I mean I had to physically step in between my parents because I was scared that it was going to be life or death, I witnessed my Dad control my mother and her response to me was "I'm strong, I deserve it" while she walked away in tears, it hurt me to see the ones I love attack eachother like this. I have seen things that I wish I could just forget but constantly hanging over my head.
I feel selfish to feel this way, I'm only 17 years old, I shouldn't ever have to feel unsafe at home or fear my loves one, but I would pretty much prefer to be anywhere but home, I'm scared and I don't know what to do. My mother has seen someone about it and trying to get things sorted, I mean my Dad he is a great guy inside, but he needs serious help, he has really bad Depression and he's had it all of my life, my Dad was my rolemodel, I want everything to get better but I feel helpless and lost.
I feel like I'm doing this alone, it's been 7 weeks since the last one and everyone seems to be happy and getting along except for me.
I guess I'm just writing this down to know im not doing this alone and that there are others who are experiencing the same problems.