Feeling fear, anxious, & unsettled
So, usually whenever I am trying to turn inward to nurture myself from things that have caused me pain, I either get distracted or something triggers past events in my mind. It could be a person or a certain subject to a certain song or situation that sends my brain to my memory box finding everything that I truly didn't want to think about in that moment. I have a bad habit of holding it all in and suppressing everything which was learned when I has experienced verbal abuse in my teenager years from both parent's and my parent's partner's. Some day's I am okay. I don't think about it. But on the day's I am thinking of those event's, I am either told to shut up or to not talk about it and that is actually hurtful to my mental health. If I am not able to talk about it or in told that I should leave it in the past, how can I properly grieve it, accept what happened, and learn to heal? I haven't been on my antidepressants in over 3 weeks or more and I am struggling. I'm tearful, I'm having emotional pain in my chest which forces me to cry, I'm feeling more anxiety which is new for me, & I'm trying to hold it all in so I don't upset anyone because I'm supposed to be the strong one. It's hard to have the want to date someone without having those feelings of abandonment or without feeling triggered. My past trauma is something I haven't dealt with yet and I'm 28yrs old. I was abused at 16yrs old. I am seeing my doctor this week and seek some help. I am exhausted.
@DaisyBeeBlooming
Hey, it's brave of you to open up about your feelings on 7Cups. It's okay to be triggered at times and feel anxious. When experiencing abuse at a young age, it's quite normal to have the instinct to suppress the emotions. There will be a good days and bad days and it's all part of a journey called "healing".
You're right about having to open up about these feelings to grieve, heal and accept. Anxiety can be difficult to cope with. I hope the doctor's appointment went well..
If you want to talk more about these issues, feel free to put out a general request or message a listener from the browse listeners page.
Here are some self-help guides which may help you- Surviving domestic assault
Traumatic experiences
Anxiety
Take care~Sierra
@DaisyBeeBlooming
I know exactly how you're feeling. Please know you are NOT alone! You're so incredibly brave for taking the steps to live the life you imagine for yourself and to receive the happiness you deserve.
I hate that there's such a stigma on how we're feeling. It's entirely normal to feel fear and sadness, and I wish society as a whole wouldn't label that as something that needs to be "fixed". I want you to know that how you're feeling is valid, and I can say this because I feel the same way. I was on anti-depressants for panic attacks and unfortunately, they weren't for me. I know how hard it is to go through something alone.
Something that has helped me so far is focusing on the things that still bring me happiness or joy- even if they're super small. What's your favorite food? Favorite smell? Surround yourself with those things! Sometimes it's okay to not know what words to say to others. Maybe try journaling your thoughts and replacing them with positive ways to look at them. Another thing that has helped me has been dancing. Whenever I'm anxious, I find it helps to put on a fun genre of music and just have fun by myself. Once you begin to trust yourself and feel safe with your own thoughts and feelings, the thoughts will slowly disappear. We wouldn't love sunny blue-skied days if we didn't go through hurricanes and lightning. You've got this. Focus on the good!
@kaileycandothis Yes unfortunately stigmas are very much present in this world. I read an article about this overweight woman whoes cancer in her lungs went undiagnosed due to many doctor's only focusing on her weight. I also read about Alyssa Milano responding to someone about how mental health should be normalized just as botox. It's crazy....Thank you for sharing some really good reminders on how to deal with anxiety. I will have to journal more and listen to my music more. I really appreciate you making me feel heard and validated❤