Relapse Dreams

@SpoodNation When I'm clean, thoughts of relapse are always on my mind, including in dreams/nightmares. They go hand and hand with cravings and such...it's like my brain is teasing me and tricking me into relapse. The dreams are sometimes upsetting and scary, reminding me of times that drugs caused harm in my life. Like overdose and fights. And it makes me want to relapse to avoid all the struggle of being clean. The withdrawals and the mental turmoil and the fact I have to face reality.

Sometimes they're good dreams that feel really real and they remind me of the release of being high and I wake up overwhelmed and desperate to get a fix.

These dreams are really unhelpful and drive me closer and closer to relapsing, sometimes even being the certain thing that pushes me back over the edge. It's somewhat comforting to find that other people are having dreams like these I guess. Our own minds are cruel.

@SpoodNation Hi there, I am a recovering alcoholic. I've been sober from alcohol for 3.5 years and I still have relapse dreams. Ive been sober from cocaine for at 10 years and I have relapse dreams about that at least once a year! I have not met a single addict/alcoholic that doesnt babe relapse dreams. It was a huge part of our lives so it makes sense to show up in dreams. Usually when I have one I ask myself if I'm doing the work I need to be doing and if not, what is missing? Am I talking enough to my sponsor, am I going to my meetings, am I doing my step work and connecting with a higher power, etc. Sometimes I'm not. Sometimes I am and I just take it as a reminder as to why I am doing the work to stay sober. Anyway there is no shame in relapse dreams. Everyone has them.

@SpoodNation Hey Spood, thanks for creating this thread on such a fascinating topic. I honestly don't recall my dreams, but nightmares definitely leave an impression on me. I'm sorry that your dreams have been troubling, and they can definitely influence relapse.

I look forward to what others have to share on this topic. Best wishes! :)

@SpoodNation yes//// almost every night for a week now. it must be anxiety coming out in my subconscious. i didn't have them for months!! i hate them. and yes it makes me feel weak...

Every single night so much I’m starting to think I did