Relapse Even Though It's Been Years
Hi everyone! I give full support for everyone here. Whether you are in recovery, relapse, years out, or struggling. Everyone here deserves love and support. Im glad we can all come together and thats special!
I haven't SH in four-ish years. I hadn't been able to wear short sleeves for maybe 8 years. My scars are as faded I think they'll ever be. This isnt a topic I talk about honestly. I dont tell people this part of me. Im feeling like I might relapse due to all the stress and pressure and self-hate. Self-discipline. Every time I look at my arm I think about all the years I couldnt wear a T-shirt. Im worried that one of these days im just going to say f it because of life and just do it. Because I feel how useless and worthless I am. Im not okay. I want to be okay but Im just not. Im allowing that dark cloud to block my sunlight... only, idk what sunlight I even have. Im useless to society. I have no purpose. I have no one and nothing. I say Im okay but Im not. I dont want others to know my deep down secrets. I dont want to be "seeking attention". I dont want to scare anyone. I dont want any spotlight or sympathy. Just empathy. Someone that will listen and understand me. I'm sorry this all turned dark. Tbh, I didnt know I was gonna say this much. I guess this is a journal entry or something, idk. Thanks for reading! Hope ur all staying safe!
@SmallShroom Hey there, hope you are doing well. This is very serious and maybe you can consult a doctor? You could also maybe share this with someone you trust. You should never hate yourself because your you no one can ever be you. If you feel down try maybe distracting yourself temporarily, don't think this could be a permanent solution just it can help maybe reduce your stress and help you get through whatever your going through.
