Relapse and getting better
I remember when I relapsed for one of the first times. I had made a promise to myself saying that I wouldnt cut anymore. So I tried and it worked for about 3 weeks, and I felt like I was really doing good. But then there was a switch in my brain whenever one of my only friends told me they had depression. I felt so out of control that I did it. And this time was bad. Before I would try to do it in places that I could hide it, but this specific time I didnt care. I did it everywhere, and deeper this time. It was undeniably the worst mental place I have ever been in. I want everyone who reads this to know that you are worth it and cutting yourself will not solve your problems. For me it just made it worse and I could no longer hide it. And the overwhelming guilt consumed me. And it is not worth it. I know that it seems much easier to say then do. But I know you are strong and if I can do it. I believe anyone can
Ever since then, I have been getting better and trying my best not to cut despite the urges. It's been about a month now, and it does get better. And now that I haven't had a relapse in a long time, I can say that it's not worth it to self harm. There are healthier ways to deal with problems. Please know that you are loved, and please dont do it.
I wanted to share this because I felt the need after reading other people's stories. So please know that you are loved and it does get better.
I wish you all the best ❤
@sincerePerson3383 thank you so much for sharing this. It always feels very warm and inspiring reading about recovery. I am really really really proud of you!
If you have the time and feel ok about it, would you share the alternatives you have found to resist to your urges? This may also help other people :)
@admaiorasemper well for me, I just try my best to distract my mind. Before I started my mental health problems I used to love to read, but ever since I've had problems I have never touched a book. So now whenever I start to get urges I'll read or even draw. I also had a stress ball I would mess with while reading to distract my hands further. Just anything really. Another thing I did, was get rid of blades and sizzors in my room, so I didnt have quick access. I know that it will be hard, but it's worth it.
I know that recovery is not easy, and you might have relapses, but that's okay. You are on the road to getting better and I know you will make it. I wish you the best 💗