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Things no one tells you about Self-Harm: Trigger Warning
by Jenna
Last post
 November 14th
...See more Everyone mentions the same things when they talk about self-harm. This is what I wish someone told me about self-harm before I fell into its tight gripping claws. 1) It's not only the cuts/bruises/burns/scratches that you have to hide. You have to hide the bloodied tissues, the used band-aids, the band-aid wrapper, and the thing you used to harm. 2) When you shower the dried blood drips out of your band-aid and down your body creating little dark red, almost brown, colored streams. It scares you at first because you think it's opened again. 3) It becomes an addiction. It becomes the only thing that helps. 4) It eventually doesn't help anymore but you keep doing it in the hope it will. 5) Your body will scar and at first, you will like it but eventually, you get sick looking at them. 6) On a bad day, you run out of space. 7) Your band-aids will soak through your jeans or top after a shower and make an obvious square or rectangle patch. 8) They start to smell bad if not looked after. 9) You constantly think about them. 10) Your sleep will hurt and every move you make will too when they are fresh. You act as you like it. You don't. 11) People will never take it seriously enough. 12) They itch like mad whilst they heal. 13) You eventually get frustrated if it has no effect. 14) You don't cry when you do it. You feel nothing. Not. A. Thing. 15) It's so so so hard to escape it. 16) It isn't beautiful. It isn't a fairy tale. It won't help you find love. It is a monster that ruins lives. Please think of all these things before you hurt yourself. You don't want to. I sound like a hypocrite because I do but trust me, you don't want to fall down the dark hole that I and many other people are already in. Put down your fist, blade, lighter, cut your nail short, and get help.
Shine Bright: I am SH-free for ____ Days
by ASilentObserver
Last post
 November 6th
...See more Well done! 💪✨  (Number) days free from self-harm is a significant accomplishment.  Please take a moment to acknowledge your strength and resilience and celebrate with us. Here are a few points to reflect on and celebrate:  * What helped you stay strong these past few days? Was it a specific coping mechanism, a supportive person, or a personal mantra? Share your tips to inspire others. * What positive changes have you noticed since being SH-free? Maybe you have more energy, better sleep, or a renewed sense of hope. Reflect on the progress you've made. * What are you looking forward to in the future? Use this milestone as a springboard for setting new goals or focusing on activities you enjoy. * Write a message to your future self: What words of encouragement would you tell yourself for the days ahead? Start sharing with us. We believe in you. 
SHA #4: Calming Affirmations for Difficult Moments
by ASilentObserver
Last post
 March 22nd
...See more Hello all,  Group Support organizing the month of Self-Harm Awareness Week,  the focus will be on discussing general awareness, and support, and celebrating milestones and small steps. This will be an opportunity for all of us to come together and extend our support and compassion to all who struggling with self-harm.  Life throws its curveballs, and sometimes we feel like we're drowning. You might be feeling overwhelmed and lost, and in those moments, the urge to self-harm might arise as a way to cope.   When you find yourself in those moments, having a set of affirmations can help ground you and bring a sense of calm. Affirmations are powerful tools that can shift your mindset and provide comfort in difficult times. Here are some affirmations you can repeat to yourself when you feel overwhelmed or tempted to harm yourself.  * "This feeling is temporary. I will get through this."  * "I am worthy of love and support. I will reach out for help." You deserve to feel safe and cared for.  * "I am strong and capable. I have faced challenges before, and I can face this one too." You are more resilient than you think. * "My pain does not define me. I am more than my struggles." Pain is a part of life, but it doesn't have to control your existence. You are a complex and worthy person. * "I will focus on what I can control, my breath, my thoughts, and my actions."  * "There is help available. I will find a healthy way to cope." Self-harm is not the answer. There are healthier ways to deal with difficult emotions.  * "I am worthy of healing. I will take steps towards feeling better today." Start small, with one positive step towards self-care. * "I deserve to be treated with kindness and compassion, especially by myself. I choose to be gentle with myself in times of distress." * "I am not alone in this. Some people care about me and want to support me through this struggle." * "My worth is not defined by my struggles or mistakes. I am inherently valuable just as I am." * "I have the power to choose how I respond to this situation. I choose to respond with love and understanding towards myself." * "I acknowledge my pain, but I also acknowledge my capacity for healing and growth. I am worthy of healing." * "I forgive myself for any past mistakes or shortcomings. I choose to let go of self-blame and embrace self-compassion." Please know that affirmations are most effective when repeated regularly and with conviction. Find the affirmations that resonate with you the most and make them a part of your daily self-care routine. If you are struggling with self-harm, please reach out for support. You are not alone, and there is hope for healing. We are all here with you to listen to and support you.  If you have any affirmation that you use, please share it with us here. Also, let's discuss and share our experiences with affirmations during overwhelming moments. All thoughts are welcomed.  ------------------------- Other posts in the SHA series:  SHA #3: Role of Acceptance & Validation [https://www.7cups.com/forum/selfharm/General_2451/SHA3RoleofAcceptanceValidation_325495/] SHA #2: "Safe Plan" for people with self-harm issue [https://www.7cups.com/forum/selfharm/InformationandResources_1079/SHA2SafePlanforpeoplewithselfharmissue_323303/] SHA #1: Do you think self-harm defines you?  [https://www.7cups.com/forum/selfharm/General_2451/SHA1Doyouthinkselfharmdefinesyou_324983/]
trigger warning shamed
by stormieandpaws
Last post
 2 days ago
...See more not sure why this still bothering me so much. years ago was with mom at store and a lady we never met befor was in line ahead of us. mom did not know her but they started talking. then mom said to her this is my crazy daughter  who cuts herself. we felt  so much shame over it still do.  we been self harm free for few years  now,  but it a daily fight for us too. my mom shamed us a lot even as a child. she know my brothers were sexually and other ways abusing us too. but she turned away from us left us being abused. we know now this was due to her whole life being abused. but that not make it right but get that her normal too. so she also kelp saying you know when you hurt yourself your hurting me. family made fun of our self harm a lot. we just learned that things we did even before 2yr was self harm but no one at all ever tried to help us as a kid. we remember very young pulling handfuls of hair out and biting self even hitting head on wall. mom only punish us or would say wait until your dad get home. we use to sneak  moonshine out of icebox and then put water in the jar to make look like none was gone. but that numbed us. did that from like 3yr and up to around yr. same with cutting started at around 7yr. no one said a thing to us about the cuts. no one even asked about how we got hurt. mom would tell others we was accident  prom people believed her. we stopped all self harm around 12yrbut we started  back up when was expecting our son, thank due to we started having flashbacks hearing alters too. also my girls who both looked like me when i was child were around same ages that the worst of the sexual abuse happened at. but this time was way worst even to point had staples in my one leg. mom used me to get pity she when we went into pychward or had been in ER she call others. she say things like she went to ER again cut self really bad or she back in pychward. even when we was losing our 3 kids to government  she made it about her and seek pity from everyone. this did not help me at all as it put me in a self harm cycle. but when we moved  away from family  in may of 2017 the self harm got less and less. then stopped thinking mom shaming us  played buf role in the self harm. as a child  think it was us seeking to be seen and cared for too. but also to be saved and well just loved. mom abused us too but that even brings more shame and makes us sick what she did to us.  it one of the things been hard to talk about too. people think moms can not abuse their girls in way we talking about. think mom kinda feed our need to self harm as she got attention and pity from others. more we learn about what seen as self harm we see we did it from young age up. feel good to be self harm free at this time and we safe too.
TW why is it so hard after years not self harming
by stormieandpaws
Last post
 October 27th
...See more my history of self harm is to me odd and different  then we heard others say. start of self harm was under 1yr. we pull our hair out and bang head on walld etc.  then as we got older we bit self with the other ones. then we started cutting self this was easy to cover up due to we helped stripe copper for dad to sale. so could just say knife slipped. but no one seem to see what we was doing as self harm. even later  on we say we had a accident  and cut self. but it happened a lot. still not get why no one seemed to care at all. we also use to sneak moonshine that parents'  keep in jars in refrigerator. so no one seem to either see the self harm or care we  was doing it. around 11yr we stopped self harming on own. but in our 20's we started self harming again and this was due to we believe the memories  of the abuse coming back and being in abusive marriage. but when we lost our kids to the state and parental rights we went off the deep end with self harm.we turned to  community  mental health place for help were we was living. the psych  there after repeatedly being sent to  mental health hospitals he got mad at us. he sent us to state mental hospital due to he thought self harm was done for attention so he said i  give you that. as most that go to state hospitals  they keep long time even years. we was there less then 3 weeks. but even that did not help. so for us it seem like we cycle in self harm as in not due it for long time then start up again. right now we not self harming it been like 4 or 5 yrs ago we did. but at times we still feel like we need to. but not acted on the feelings. we trying hard to not go back to self harming. we have learned better coping skills over the years. even when we last time self harmed it was lot less then before. but at times we fear we slip up and self harm again.  it hard to even admit  we still think about self harming after years not doing it feel like we alone in this way of feeling like want to self harm but not acting on it in long time. not sure why we still even think about doing it after not doing it for many years
Update
by SageFlower2008
Last post
 October 3rd
...See more I am very happy to report that I am over 2 months clean!!  Recovery is possible and we can do it together!
Been almost 5 weeks clean, strong.
by Sidezombie88
Last post
 August 31st
...See more I feel good, actually, first time in a while. I like this feeling.
SH Trick
by reeseisgreat
Last post
 June 27th
...See more hiya! new to this thread : 3 I'm currently a monthish sober of sh (woohoo!) and I js wanted to share a little trick my therapist taught me to help recover ik urges get strong as ***! that's ok!! what i was taught to do is actually hold ice any time you feel like relapsing or js shing in general. it's cold and not only acts as a calmer to ur nerves, it gets ur mind off it!! it also will hurt a bit if held for too long might not help everyone, but it rlly helped me!! : D
I just don't want to any one know
by anonyBeing3649
Last post
 May 8th
...See more I just took SH tool and SH four times with it. The wounds are not big, but are visible and I don't want anyone to see it. what to do?
TW mentions of $h
by Tamikiii
Last post
 April 22nd
...See more Ever since school and my other hobbies (mainly piano lessons and taekwondo) started, I've been so stressed to the point where it affected my mental health and my mental health affected the perfect relationship I used to have. It hasn't really ended well for me and so I started sh. My friends cleaned my wounds and tried looking for good alternatives for me but nothing just seems to work. Up to this day I still inflict pain on myself. But right now, I started getting clean for a maximum of 2 - 3 days and I end up doing it again. I really hope things get better for me.
Bad Habits
by Sparrow555
Last post
 March 15th
...See more I'm autistic and have ADHD and anxiety. I pick my skin all the time (mostly my hands). Some of the time I don't notice when I'm doing it but even when I do I physically can't stop myself. I need to stop but I don't know how or what to do. If you have any advice, please let me know.
TW: Sh relapse...
by TheGambitSystem
Last post
 February 17th
...See more tw: last night was rough for me. ace got really, really mad at me and he started to 'close off the exits.' he basically 'muted' the other headmates and cornered me, per-se. he started saying that i didn't matter, that without him, i was nothing, that he got me through when life was horrible, that i was a misstake, a liability to myself.  I tried to fight him as best i could. i tried breathing exercises, grounding, petting my cat, crying....it didn't work. i felt like i wasn't real. none of it was real and the walls were closing in. i had a panic attack and started shaking. i hallucinated that...well...someone...who's done...bad things...was coming and knocking on my door. i panicked, and asked ace to help me.  he just laughed at my lack of control and taunted me. i hazily remember getting a knife from the kitchen and sharpening it for a few minutes. then i sliced and cut my thighs. the blood running down my legs calmed me, and made me feel as if i were back in control. ace praised me...i hate myself for loving his toxic ways...  i retreated back into the mind and he took control, cleaning the cuts and bandaging them. we didn't say anything to our parents...and they think i am fine.. i'm not fine, i'm not okay, i'm not human, i'm not alright its too f*^$! loud in my head! i'm sorry, callie  -💛
About Recovery
by Aulyacu
Last post
 February 6th
...See more 1. It takes time We cannot force ourselves to immediately forget the problems or pain we feel. By just taking a vacation to an island, then hoping that everything will recover. Healing is a matter of sincerity. So let it flow, don't rush. 2. Painful It's like a wound on the leg, it hurts when it's touched by asphalt, it hurts when it's cleaned with water and alcohol and iodine. Even though the wound eventually heals, the healing process is painful. 3. It will definitely leave an impression What is called a memory/problem that will never be forgotten. But if you have completely recovered, then you will just remember the incident as an ordinary memory without feeling as sad as when it first happened.
Self-Harm
by HealerRecel02
Last post
 December 10th, 2023
...See more Dear strong people that struggling with self-harm i wanted you to know that you are already enough even your mind said you are never enough. I know you will feel confused too and hurt then it lead you to self harm but believe me this shall too pass! I have been there too. It is never easy to get out from it but you are so much stronger than the demons that convince you to do that! you deserve better! I am so proud of you for trying ur best to get out from it!! you are not alone :) all listeners here will supporting you through your journey including myself! do not hesitate to pm me if you wanna talk about self harm, thank you for being yourself :)
The Cycle
by OllieRNLI999
Last post
 December 3rd, 2023
...See more Below is an image sourced from MHF. I have only one question: How do you feel after reading that all of this is temporary?

Hello, and welcome to the Self-Harm Recovery Subcommunity! It’s great to have you here, and we are proud of you for making the first brave step in reaching out for support. This is our supportive, safe and friendly environment, and we are glad to have you here 😃. Feel free to direct any questions to the appropriate leader of our community, which you can find at the bottom of the about section. ⭐️

🌟 Feel free to say hello and introduce yourself! Or if you want to just browse for now that is okay too! Take your time. We have several topics in our community such as the goals and success corner, recovery zone, support area and much more! Please use the relevant topic where appropriate so we can keep our community organised🌟

🌟 Please make sure to read through our community guidelines and browse our resources available 🌟

🌟 To join our community leadership team feel free to look through Here for the requirements and apply to join our team 🌟

🌟 Again, thank you for joining our community, and we look forward to seeing your progress on your journey! If you have any questions, please reach out to the relevant leader 😊

Community Guidelines

These guidelines are inspired by some communities around 7 cups! This is so we can adapt our little family to accommodate as many different life experiences and situations as possible. We recognize we cannot adapt to every circumstantial rule. However, we have outlined some of the common guidelines needed for our community. ❤️

✪ Please do not share any graphic images or descriptions of self-harm tools!

✪ Please do not mention the name of any tools used for self-harm in any area of the self-harm recovery community.

✪ Names of methods of self-harm are allowed to be shared in the group support room, but where possible please try to exchange a method name for the phrase "self-harm".

✪ When mentioning methods of self-harm or potentially triggering details of another topic in the forums, please put a trigger warning at the top of the post so people are able to click away from the post if they would like to. Additionally, please try to find an appropriate place within our forums to make your post. Certain areas are reserved for specific content, so please consider this when making your post.

✪ Pro-self-harm content will not be tolerated!

✪ Please be respectful to everyone, members and listeners alike.

✪ Remember, everyone's experiences are different. Please do not undermine or invalidate anyone's situation because it is not what most would consider "normal". We are a diverse community and have people from many backgrounds, so please always be respectful!

✪ General kindness, courtesy, and etiquette are heavily appreciated!

Read the 7 Cups Guidelines