Same ๐ฎโ๐จ
@Straykidss
What do the scars represent for you? What about them do you miss?
I have felt this way, as well in the past. For me, it was a physical representation of the emotional pain I felt. Seeing the scars meant I felt justified in what I did. It demonstrated to me the severity. However, I have learnt over time that just because they fade away from our eyesight, doesn't mean they're gone forever. If it helps, remember that every scar has created a miniscule change in our body. New cells appear, our skin will never be the same as it was before the scar.
If the scars helped you not have to tell people your pain but instead they could just see it on you, then I think that could require some deeper digging with a mental health professional. If you don't see anyone, I would highly recommend you do so. I go to therapy and I love it. It is so helpful to have someone who doesn't know you or your life and talk to them. They will listen to your version of events. You can be who you are without judgment. It takes time, but you start to feel comfortable with them once you've built that connection and rapport and trust.
thank you so much for your words : (
To me, my scars represent many things. firstly, it show me a way to my strength. so, on rough days i could look at my them and tell myself that "i am stronger than before. i can survive it" i am never ashamed of them. however, those scars were never deep so nobody saw it, nobody knows and that's the possible reason they started disappearing. also to me, they are beautiful. that's why i miss them. is it okay to say this? is it valid to call them beautiful? i dont know.
From past two months, i was having these urges non stop. i try to resist but each morning when i wake up, my head get filled up with thoughts about eating disorders (i dont think i have ED. i am not diagnosed or anything but i just have a feeling), i ends up relapsing and doing SH. so, if i dont see scars, my brains tells me to draw one and that is what the urge is about i guess.
therapist? right now, i am a responsibility of my parents. i need to talk to them first but they seems to blame me everything, for not eating, for doing things wrong. once my mom said "it's all in your head only" i dont wanna talk to them again. i dont want to talk about it to anybody. i'm having a hard time validating my own feelings.
isn't there a possibility of everything to heal by its own? i hope so. i'm only wishing that after all the bad days, there's a good day ahead. thank you for listening.
@Straykidss
Yeah same. I don't even know is trying to k*s is self harm or not but yeah relatable:(