Lost listener

Hi @Chronium! I'm sorry to hear you lost your listener, a listener may "disappear" for various reason such as leaving for a self-care break, account suspension, etc. They can come back one day if they desire to <3 I hope you'll be able to find another good listener for you!

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It wasn't easy finding him. Most of the time nobody responds or I give up waiting. I have given up

Plus I do not want to be left hanging like that again.

@Chromium I know it can definitely be hard to find a good listener for us, everyone is different and you can't replace someone fully, but it's always worth trying :) I hope you'll be alright no matter what you decide to do!

This has happened to me twice. Both times my listener's account was suspended, and this is someone who is a very active and, at this point, "high-ranking" member of the 7 Cups listener community.

I've started past threads pleading for more consideration of the member's experience when this happens. I know how awful it is to have someone you've opened up to, who is responsive and helpful and validating, simply disappear without warning or explanation. I consider it downright inhumane. And it's especially frustrating to know that even the very best listeners can wind up with suspended accounts simply because of the many possibilities for misunderstandings or even petty attacks that can come with being an active contributor to 7 Cups.

@squib do you think it's because this person blocked you for some reason?

@aricat

Absolutely not. Unless my listener has been lying to me, which I find exceedingly unlikely. And I've heard plenty from other listeners about getting accounts suspended. Indeed, the second time this happened what helped me through was a listener who griped from a member account in a chatroom about getting banned, and they told me 2 weeks was pretty typical. So I calmed myself by saying in 2 weeks I'd have my answer and, as if on cue, my listener returned.

@squib @aricat

Sorry you've had to deal with that, Squib! Just an FYI--even if someone has blocked you, they will show up on the Browse Listeners page (you then get a notice if you try to message them). So if their profile doesn't show up, they have deactivated or suspended or whatnot.

@RocketsMom

@RocketsMom

This is the very first time (and I've asked before!) I've had anyone describe what it "looks like" when one has been blocked. There needs to be more transparency about the process on these things! It's not rocket science (maybe just RocketsMom science ;) )Thank you!

@squib

No problem! Please feel free to PM me if you have questions.

@aricat

In other threads I've offered many suggestions. One is that there could be a mechanism where listeners who decide to take time away could, rather than using their profile to announce their unavailablity, set an anticipated return date. A member looking for that listener, while they are unavailable, could then be told their listener is unavailable and plans to return on such-and-such date. This could be set automatically when an account gets suspended, so the member cannot tell whether it was a suspension or just a break their listener chose to take.

@squib

I see, so that's what happened.. thanks a lot I'll keep this in mind if some member goes incognito on me

Thank you. It is helpful to know I'm not alone. I do not think I will be able to take that risk again here. How hard would it really be to send an automatic reply to a listeners chats saying something generic that they are gone.