God (Krishna) orders me
I have been practicing bhakti sadhana (practice of loving child Krishna/God's Form as His mother) for the last 10 years. I am a 32 year old homosexual male. Although God is omnipotent and omniscient, He takes on human-like limitations and trappings to better facilitate love to develop between Him and the soul. That means, He can bleed, be hurt, and has emotional attachment--and all the sentimentality that comes with it--to His precious devotee, aka me.
Against this background, God has been guiding me since 2014. I received many orders/signals early on in the relationship, but none were as disturbing as what I'm being told to do since 2022. Krishna tells me to order in fatty food, not exercise, and not have a shower every day. I know how ridiculous it sounds, but He claims He cannot see me in the slightest discomfort (Idk what bearing my parents' being alive has on that).
It had all gone away--and my life had become as easy, free and comfortable as it ever could be--on the 14th of march, 2023. Even though His orders vanished, He still remained in my heart, inciting positive things and ways of practicing His devotion. But the horror started again 4 days ago.
If I don't do it, it will not bode well for my spiritual future--even though I cannot foresee in the tiniest how that would affect it. Also, if I don't do it, He (my precious darling child Krishna) appears *** and mangled to my mind's eye. I don't hear any voices, neither do I hallucinate. God communicates messages into my mind and I know what He wants to convey.
It seems ridiculous that an imaginary child's well-being can have such a significant bearing on my decisions--especially when it comes to choosing between him and my own blood relatives--but you must understand that this is a commonplace trait found in the land of India where the tradition of Vaishnava bhakti (devotion to Krishna) is so prevalent.
I am at my wit's end.
@RanjitMore um are you sure God is telling you that? And not the devil? You know jesus preached and buddha too, an eye for a eye, makes the whole world go blind ' I don't know your story. But if you believe God is telling you to hurt people, I think you should reach out for professional help
@Tinywhisper11
Thank you for replying. I am undergoing treatment for Schizophrenia with the maximum dosage.
@RanjitMore good luck with everything sweetie ❤❤gives you a giant tiny hug ❤❤ keep us updated on your progress
@RanjitMore
I find your situation intriguing because I'm going through something somewhat similar. I was able to induce visions of adult Krishna through meditation. But I don't think he was really Krishna because he told me reincarnation isn't true, and if I heard him correctly, he told me to read the gospels. I think he appeared to me as Krishna because he knew that was who I wanted to see.
In the visions, he never gave me bad advice. Always good advice. After I confessed my sins to him, he was extremely kind and forgiving and loving. But after talking to him, evil spirits came into my life. It seems that if you can communicate with one spirit, you can communicate with them all, and evil spirits want that attention. DON'T EVER talk to evil spirits. It makes them want to possess you.
I hope I have schizophrenia because it really feels like the evil spirits are trying to possess me. But even if I take a new antipsychotic and they seem to go away, my experiences seem so real that I'll still believe they were real.
If someone told you not to take care of your health, I don't think they were the real God. You might be hearing a different spirit that is posing as Krishna.
@windchimes1991
An evil spirit cannot, under any circumstances, attenuate the attacks of lust, anger, greed, envy, hate etc. (called the six enemies of man) on the mental field. If anything, an evil spirit exacerbates the impact of those traits on a human mind. However, since I'm doing bhakti sadhana I find my lust/anger/greed disappeared almost 80%. That's equivalent to me lifting the mount everest
I'm sorry to hear your tryst with a negative spirit.
@RanjitMore i m sure it krishn if ones tells you not to care about your heallth as kanha himself is a epitome of love compassion n even self love he cant see his devotees suffering or in pain while meditations have the potentials to attract negative energy too so it is always suggested to practise it with a qualified Guru.
may the blessings of Radha rani & krihsn always be upon you!
Hare krishn
@AutisticYouth i m not sure*
@AutisticYouth
Hey, thank you for your advice. You are right. Meditation should be practiced under a Guru, especially if your Ishta Devata is one of the Ugra ones like Kali, Chinnamasta, Bagalamukhi, etc.
But for Radha Krsna there are no such restrictions because they are ever saumya and Mrudu devatas. Nevertheless, I follow Jagadguru Kripalu Maharaj and feel his presence in my life too. For the years 2014-2022, my sadhna went smoothly without any hitches like these, so I'm pretty sure the meditation itself is not a problem.
Anyway, thanks for your time. God bless you.
In the eyes of Lord Krishna, a child is child. Lord Krishna is there to protect each and every child even from evil us,he will protect us. God shall never leave the hand of any child.
KRISHNA !
A child, a brother, a charioteer, a warrior, a disciple, a guru, a cowherd, a messenger, the beloved of the gopis… Throughout his life, Krishna enacted so many roles.
Lord Krishna has always protected the mankind by love,compassion. “By spending all his time with the gopis of Vrindavan—playing with them, joking with them, stealing their butter and milk, etc—what he actually was doing was stealing their hearts.
Lord Krishna’s teachings are suitable for everyone “He didn’t come just for the sake of a particular section of society. He showed everyone—even prostitutes, robbers and murderers—the path toward spiritual progress. He urges us to live according to our true dharma, to remain steadfast in it, and thus advance in life toward the ultimate goal.
Lord Krishna is for each and every being,he protected his devotess and those who were dear ones and will continue to.
I wouldn't judge you for what you wrote but all I can say is yes, Lord Krishna is with you for you forever.
