Toxic on verge of separating
My relationship has been up and down from the beginning. We are codependent. I try to change my actions but he talks like he doesn't see it. It's very unmotivating. Our communication is terrible. I feel like we should separate but it is so hard to leave esp bc we have a child together. But we have tried therapy. Things just get so bad so fast. Neither of us feel safe or trust the other. He's never hit me, but last night he put his hand on my mouth to force me to stop talking (I was hurt telling him to leave the room, he was apparently trying to help fix the hurt and I would not stop talking) but bc he felt it was ok to put hands on me in ANY context I worry it will just escalate. The relationship is full of red flags but I was raised by an emotional abuser and I love him despite the red flags. It is so hard to leave.
@reliableCherry9767
Thank you for sharing. I am glad you are here. I am also trying to take steps of exiting, and I know how difficult it is. The most improtant thing is to keep talking to others. Talk to everyone you can. Talk to any friends, family, talk to people here (especially if you feel that you talk to the others too much - this is something I find very liberating here). I went to a therapist earlier this week and said "I want out, how do I start" and it was encouraging and supportive. It will not be easy, I know, but I know you can do this. It is the right thing to do *both* for you and your child.
I believe in you. You are not alone. Please keep talking to anyone you can. We are here, and there are others who care about you. Best wishes.
Thank you. I agree I came here bc I am tired of talking to others in my life and afraid I am a burden or getting annoying bc it's literally years I've felt that we are not right for each other but it is so hard to actually leave. Thank you for sharing, helps to know I am not alone ❤️
@reliableCherry9767
It is one of the big reasons I am here also. I promise you will never be a burden here. Not once. This is a safe place where you can talk over and over and over about the same thing until it helps, until you find your way. You are welcome here, and I am glad that you are here.