How to handle my relationship while clean

@xoNicholexo

HI Dear,

first of all congradulations for this amazing and brave step! This requires many strenghts that i am sure you own, from working many years in the feild i have come to experience how hard this is and the challenges are yet to come. So first thing i wanted to ask is if you are in any kind of support system - like twelve steps , therapy or any group ? Because it is hard to do this alone, and if there is support why use it , and you are - just like writing here !. Now regarding your question- you are pointing out something new that you are facing and this is to really develop deep intimacy ..as you described you never really let yourslf be in that position without numbing yourself ...i assume it is so hard to be fragile and exposed and prone to get hurt in a way feeling out of control...intimcay can be very scarying sometimes ..I feel that the key with your boyfreind would be to talk and share all the microfeelings, to get the validation you need and to take things slow , because you do not want to get to emotionally flooded right now , because you are learning a new emotional self regulation right now .... and little steps ,, and sensitivty will help you identify your feelings and help you stay connected .. a little bit like learning how to walk .....