Breakup sadness
I have been dating someone for almost a year. He emotionally abused and would constantly gaslight me and manipulate me. Our highs were super high and our lows were super low. It got to the point where we were fighting everyday. It got to the point where I thought I’d had enough and I broke up with him. A couple hours after I broke up with him he invited another girl to his house after the bar and said they just kissed. A couple days later he confessed everything to me and told me he was sorry and would change. He wanted to be better for us. I was hesitant at first but we were working on things and it was actually working out. Then, this past weekend we both went out and he started screaming at me and it was really bad. Basically he told me he wanted things to be over. I didn’t put up a fight and said ok. I know I need to get him out of my life for good but it’s so hard. I don’t find fun or happiness in the things I used to. Even my friends don’t make me happy anymore. I’m so checked out of my own life and I don’t know what to do. I can’t focus on anything else and I’m sad 24/7
@sunnyNorth1823
you know the drill ok for short time then fight .... repeat .... dating or finding new people can be hard but it is an investment into happy for longer
It is a situation we tend to see more all the time ....
A tiny bit of fun or happy NOW vs a long term happy when you find the right one.......
same with friends you can out grow them yet people try so hard to keep it alive so they can what say we have been friends for X amount of time......the only way out of sad is you taking one step at a time and doing something new ........
@sunnyNorth1823
I'm sorry you had to go through that :( He had no right to treat you that way, and you did not deserve it. It's difficult to move on after a breakup, so you are expected to feel that way. Remember that every day is new, and you're growing stronger than you realize.
@sunnyNorth1823 Hey, I'm truly sorry you had to go through that. Being gaslit and manipulated, always makes you question yourself even though you're not in the wrong, and it is a terrible feeling. He had no right to treat you like that. And I want to say, taking that big step to end things with him the first time, it probably took you a lot of courage, and you should be very proud of yourself for that.
And I understand why you got back with him, and hoped he would change, there probably was so much history built in that 1 year you were with him which just doesn't disappear. But when he yelled at you over weekend, I hear that you felt hopeless in trying to make it again, you didn't want to try anymore, which I understand. I have been in a relationship similar to this, and I understand how lost you can feel after 1 year. At the end of the day, you were able to stay strong to let him go the second time. I understand it is very tough right now, but take small steps, give it time. What are the things you used to do before you started dating him?
@sunnyNorth1823 I am sorry to hear how you feel, no one deserve to feel this way. Give your self time to heal, breakup is never easy however, it gets better over time.