I’m so done
I just got accused of poisoning our daughter against my husband by him!! WTF?! She’s an extremely clever 7yo girl with autism. There’s no possible way I could make her say anything if I wanted too! She tells in exactly as it is!! He has threatened to leave us soooo many times (I have a 9yo son also). He yells at her a the time and wonders why she doesn’t respect him. Mayer because he doesn’t show her respect? He just thinks he’s owed it due to him being her father. 🙄 I’m so sick of the threats and told him to go then today but he hasn’t got enough balls to follow through with his threats. How do I get rid of him? We put in exactly half each to buy this house and I’m not going anywhere, this is my kids home and I’m not the one making threats. I’m so done with his bs. What can I do next?
@lightHuman1618
Sounds like the two of you have a lot to talk about, in all seriousness. You either pull it together and try to solve the problems you have in your own household or it's just a house divided against itself. But it takes two to do that. It's important to clarify that the both of you shouldn't be enemies, the problems are, it's important to frame things that way.
If you must lead the conversation, if you feel you're the only one who has the capacity for that, and if you both really want to fix things, then I wouldn't waste time. Otherwise, things just fall apart. No wonder why marriage is so difficult to maintain. Don't sweep tiny little problems under the carpet. I believe this will take every bit of energy you both have, and hopefully the result will be good, for you, him and your daughter.
@TheMeaningfulLife A valuable and practical reply, I appreciate it
@lightHuman1618
in addition to this one, if you’re able to afford it, try seeing a marriage or family therapist who might be able to get your husband to see the things he’s doing to contribute to the issues. Based on your description, I highly doubt he’s going to be open to seeing things that way if you tell him that. He might be more open to it coming from a third person with no personal stake in the situation.
@lightHuman1618 I’m sorry you and your children are in such an unpleasant environment. I grew up in a similar environment. I’m guessing your husband is insecure and wants control. He certainly isn’t going to gain compliance from your child by yelling at her. If he is anything like my father was he doesn’t even need a reason to be angry he will find find fault in the smallest thing and that will escalate and become his cause. I can’t give advice on what you should do but I do wish you the best.