Need some advice about a break in a relationship
My partner or ex partner have been on a break for 3 months after he choose to go on one after saying I didn't do enough house work. I have not long had are second child (almost 8 months now) our oldest is 6 and very energetic. I have been doing the house work since showing him I heard wjat he said but it wasn't enough. He says he can't stop the voices that say I'm going to back track. He's been diagnosed with depression but isn't on meds and waiting on counselling just a week ago. We have both just lost a very good friend. But this good friend said to be life is to short just a day before he passed. I want to wait until after the funeral as my ex was very very close to him but should I give a time limit or a ultimatum about us or give him more time and to start counselling before this? I love him and want him home and even tho he said he misses me he just won't make up his mind about us so what do I do?
@saz12
Balancing the weight of a break, the demands of motherhood, and now the fresh loss of a friend is a lot to carry all at once. It’s clear you deeply care about him and want to give him space for his healing journey, yet you’re also in this place of waiting, unsure of where things stand.
After such a significant loss, emotions can be so raw, and it might be wise to let him have this time to grieve and start his counseling. Grief can amplify the struggles he's already facing with depression, so holding space for him while he begins to process everything might allow him to reach some clarity about both his emotions and your relationship. But it’s also important to honor your own needs and boundaries. Setting a gentle timeline could help both of you have a sense of direction without feeling pressured—maybe something along the lines of checking in after he’s had a few counseling sessions.
In the meantime, would it feel right to focus on what’s within your control, like caring for yourself and finding support for your own emotions? You’re doing so much already, both for him and your family, and you deserve support, too. Whatever the outcome, know that you’re allowed to seek stability and peace in your life, just as he’s seeking in his.
@saz12 Hi, I really hope he helps with housework too. It's not just one persons job.