lost my best friend
A person I once considered my best friend has stopped talking to me for the past 2 years.
It started after she graduated college and began working fulltime. She started nitpicking everything I said and did. She said that I only do things that are convenient for me and that I don't think about my word choices and how they affect her. We had been friends for over 13 years, and I thought by now she understood my personality and humor, and that my intentions are always good with everyones best interest in mind. In fact, I often place other people's needs above my own, to a fault.
After many months of apologizing and insisting that I am trying my best to be a good friend, I decided that was enough. I told her that I will no longer apologize for trying my best. I felt that she was taking it her frustrations from work on me. She even suggested that since I was still studying and in school, I am more privileged and luckier than her, that I don't work as hard.
I agree that I don't understand what she is experiencing, but at the same time, she was dragging me down and was making me question my integrity and my abilities to be a compassionate and overall good friend. It was hurting me, and impacting me on a very deep level.
Ever since that day that I told her I would no longer tolerate her negative behavior towards me, our relationship has never been the same. I would still invite her to get coffee, and she would cancel last minute.
I miss my friend. :(
@jieanah Losing a friend of so many years is usually a painful experience, as it has been for you. From what you have reported, it appears that she wasn't treating you with the care and kindness one expects from a good friend. As hard as it was for you to set limits with her, and as hard as it is for you to be without her now, it's clear that you made a healthy decision. I wish you the best of luck in finding a new best friend, someone who will appreciate you, and cherish all you have to offer her! 
