Talking to possibly actually decent person?
Hey guys, so as you know, I haven't exactly had the best luck with people in my life, I guess I just seem to attract a rough crowd of people, I'd like to think it's because I try to be very understanding of people and help them out if I can, nurturing to some degree even as some including myself may call it. I've been used an awful lot in the past so nowadays after all of the trauma I've been through with it, I naturally feel a little bit suspicious of people when they start to learn more about me. I don't want them to feel uncomfortable and run away, but I also don't wanna be criticized for my actions and manipulated based off of some less pretty more personal details about me. I was really surprised when tonight I talked to an old friend of mine about everything that's gotten me quite shook up a bit recently, and how she was...actually pretty decent?! While this may sound like a good thing, I was more than a little skeptical at first glance since the last person to do that completely abused me and threw me way more than just under the bus in the end of it all. So, when she was so nice to me, I was honestly more than caught a bit off guard as I was at one of my weaker points right about then in tears and she actually supported me and made me feel better at the end of it. I've known her since we were kids back in 2013, but I never really did tell her much personal information about myself since back then I just didn't really have those kinds of problems or really thought much of them at the time anyway, I feel like a part of me wants to trust but then again, another part of me is really suspicious cause of my past records on those kinds of stuff, What do you personally think? Should I trust her? I feel like I should but I'm not really sure at this point.
@Mikathewolfdog I think as you talk to her more and more you will be able to tell if you can trust her. I can definitely understand where you're coming from, as I too have attracted some pretty hurtful people trying to help them and understand them. I think it's great that you've found someone that is seemingly trustworthy and has supported you in a way that makes you feel better - that's important to have in your life. I think there is really only one way to learn how to trust again and that is .. to trust again. As hard as it may be, I would try to take it slow. Don't reveal too much about yourself at once and just listen to your instincts. It's hard to not be influenced by the past and easy to shut people out, but I think you have the courage and the instincts to tell you if you can proceed with the relationship. I hope she is someone you can learn to trust and can be a good friend to you. Remember you always have the listeners at 7 cups and you can feel free to message me directly @Calidescopeheart if you would like to chat more in depth! All the best. Take care
@Mikathewolfdog
you don't need to make a decision right away. This stuff takes time after so many traumatic events. But one thing you can be sure: there are people who you can trust.
This world has good people and bad people. And if this friend of yours seem nice and all ears and loving, why not give her the benefit of the doubt? Trust a bit here and there and test the waters.
My advice so you can control this is remembering things now are under your control. You can trust her but you don't need to 100% trust her. In fact trusting people 100% often makes us have unrealistic expectations anyways.
Just be open and open up a bit by bit.
best of luck :)