Leaving Toxic Friendships
Hey everyone. Recently I have decided to end a friendship with my so-called best friend of 10+ years and her fiancé. All I need to do to make it official is send them the letter I wrote to them, but I could use some well wishes and support because I find myself scared of sending it. This relationship has been toxic for some time now but I didn't realize it until the last few years. They do not support me at all and constantly make me feel guilty for nearly every decision I make. They make me feel like a bad friend and a bad person for hanging out with and having fun with other people. They put me down all the time, calling me and my actual friends (who helped me realize how awful they are) terrible names, and worthless human beings. They refuse to apologize or talk about things with me when I try to engage with them and post passive-aggressive comments aimed at me to make me feel bad instead of telling me upfront that there is an issue. They blame me for their depression, and told me this while I was at the hospital visiting my grandmother who recently passed away due to cancer, and didn't show any real sympathy at all. This is just the nutshell. Other people saw this relationship's effect on me long before I did, and I suppose I've been feeling a bit trapped and scared to speak up because of how they might react. And now I'm scared to even send the letter. I could really use some help and support. Thank you.
@smilebirb - I'm really proud of you for recognizing that it is a toxic relationship and taking the steps you need to cut it off and protect yourself. I know that's not easy, but it is so important. I'm sorry that you didn't receive a response when you first posted this, but I wanted to reach out and see how it went and now that it's a year later, how are you? Have you been able to move past this pain and into happier and more fulfilling relationships? Hope you're well!
@smilebirb
Well, first, I think it's great that you were able to recognize that the relationship was toxic for you! I understand how hard it can be to finally confront someone and tell them that you are unhappy, but it is incredibly important and vital. If you feel as though you would be better without them, that is something you definitely should do and be content doing. Bettering yourself and self-care is of the upmost importance.
@smilebirb Hey that is so great that you recognized that it is an unhealthy relationship and you were planning to free yourself from it. I hope everything worked out for you and just know that there are people here on 7 cups that are here to support you. Best wishes.
@smilebirb I think you're doing an amazing job by doing this. It takes a lot to end friendships sometimes, especially when you've been friends with the person for a long time. Toxic friendships/relationships can bring you down and sometimes you may not even realize it. I wish you nothing but the best! :)
