Don't know what to do; didn't know where to post this, really.
So, a friend of mine was dating this girl, but things didn't work out and he just didn't want to be with her anymore. She's always been a close friend of mine as well, but now it's starting to kinda lean into something more. Is this something I should pursue, and talk to him about or should I just leave it alone and try to push to stay just friends with her? They've been split for a few months now.
And I'd never do it behind his back, I'm not that kind of person. If I go forward, I'm going to put it out in the open. I'm just torn, because he claims he has no feelings for her at all, which is why he left her. But on the other hand I keep hearing "nah man, bro/guy code" which has me anxious about the whole thing being a big faux pas, even though we do genuinely have feelings for each other. So I dunno. Maybe I'll just talk to him about it and see how he feels about the situation.
@CuriousHippo Thanks for sharing this! We're glad to have you here in our community (:
Have you and the girl spoken and confirmed that you both have feelings for each other? Even if you haven't, I do agree that it would be a good idea to speak with her ex / your other friend just to clarify things so that he hears it from you and not through the grapevine. Extra clarity and honesty won't hurt, and it does show a level of respect and consideration in honoring your friendship with him.
If you've already spoken with the girl and had that conversation confirming mutual feelings, I think it's still a good idea to touch on things with the guy and let him know the truth of the feelings but also let him know that you want to be aware and considerate of his feelings and your friendship with him, especially because he may still be recovering from the split.
Please feel free to message me if you'd like to further discuss this 💜