Dealing With Troublesome Friends
I have this best friend. And she is a very good friend, we have the same humour, and we both have a pretty similar view on the world. However this friend is also causing me some stress. She cuts, and I don't know how to deal with it but on top of that she always posts stuff on FB like "My life is over, I'm done" or "There's nothing for me here anymore" and at first I thought that she was being depressed about her break up... But then a day later she got a girlfriend whom she told me is the love of her life and she actually got engaged to in like a month and I'm her friend so I would support her through murder but then she broke up with the girl to get back with her ex girlfriend... Which she again broke up with a week later saying they'll be just friends and she started dating some other girl she just met.... And guess what, she is now saying she dosnt think it will work out. My other best friend and I have discussed how she might be doing all these things for attention. Because she could be joking around and laughing over text one second and the next she is telling me how done she is and asking me if my life is better or worst since I met her. And when I'm at her house she dosnt bring that stuff up, only over text. And I feel guilty because what if she really is feeling all these things and I'm not believing her. Im trying to be a sopportive friend but sometimes I feel overwhelmed by it all.
If you are dealing with troublesome friends, you should adress the situation by speaking or texting them about it. If you cannot do that, you can get someone else to talk to them or just leave them alone for a little while. Just know that we all make mistakes and everything will get.all better!!
Hey @Pokyzard!
This is a tough problem to get into! It happens quite often, and I think a loooot of us have had that one friend whose relationship life is always turbulent.
It sounds like she's also inconsistent about how she acts. One moment she'll be joking and the the next she's asking you questions about if your life is better or worse since meeting her. And she doesn't ask those questions in person so you're not sure if she's just playing games or if it's serious.
Trying to figure all this out and keep yourself grounded during these sudden changes in emotions is very overwhelming and tiring!
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I don't know your friend so I won't make any judgment calls. However, it is possible for her to be feeling these emotions and her inconsistency is due to her trying to hide her insecurities as much as possible. Sometimes the mask breaks.
It's hard trying go to into a super supportive mode every time this happens, I totally get that.
Rather than trying to determine if she's being truthful and reading into it, you could try just asking her questions. For example, when she's telling you how done she is and asks you if your life is better or worse since you met her, ask her what prompted her to ask that question? It's a pretty serious question, so what made her want to ask it?
You can continue being supportive and this gives her the opportunity to talk about some of these issues if she wants to. As far as the relationship situation, unfortunately that's a part of life. Some people get into a few volatile relationships.
Wishing you the best <3
