I met someone great, but I'm so anxious...
I've been really down since my last breakup. Not because I wanted to be with him anymore, but overall really lonely. I just moved really far internationally for school and covid has things closed down and I've not made many friends yet. I've been struggling quite a bit with my mental health.
I met someone very recently, and we've been on three dates so far. I feel like we clicked just instantly, it was like I'd known him for years. It's the first time I've ever felt so good about someone it was literally agonizing. He's so smart, thoughtful, funny, and passionate, I could gush about him all day but I will stop myself.
But the problem is, my anxiety keeps telling myself in the back of my head that it's too good to be true. He's the kind of person I've always wanted to date but never have, and I figured I never could. I'm so afraid I'm going to get to know him and he will end up hating me, or I'll do something weird to scare him off. It's a miserable feeling because I really, really like this person, and he's given every indication that he is just as into me. But I keep getting what ifs in my head, like what if I'm undeserving? What if I'm uninteresting? What if he's only pretending to be nice, and leaves me eventually for someone cooler?
I've never dated someone I feel like I was genuinely enamored by, like to this extent. I always figured I couldn't or wouldn't. Most if the people I dated weren't very kind to me, or didn't recognize my worth. And now I'm here and I like this person so much, and who seems like he genuinely cares, and who is everything I could ask for in a partner but I'm terrified. I feel like I should open up about it to him just so he knows where my brain is at but I don't know how without it being weird. I just don't want my anxiety to get in the way and ruin this. I need this so badly and I like this person so so much, I don't want my brain to cause me to lose him. I want to know how to stop on these stupid thoughts and just let myself enjoy the moment
